RUSH: Here is Scott in Jacksonville, Florida. Hi, Scott. Nice to have you on the program.
CALLER: Jack Bauer and Allen Brothers mega dittos.
RUSH: Thank you, sir!
CALLER: Happy anniversary. I’ve been listening to you since ’92. I’ve told my wife’s grandfather, who’s 93 years old, World War II bombardier to listen to you; he’s listening to you right now. My father-in-law, so many people I’ve told about you. The one thing I had told Bo that I think of these last 20 years, Rush, what you’ve brought to us. I remember you on PBS with Norm Ornstein when you talked about the House Banking Scandal, your impressions you’ve done over the years: Judge Hoerchner, Senator Hollings, James Carville. I remember Kennedy’s in Jeopardy. I mean, what a great parody. I think it was about a week of Kennedys in Jeopardy you did. I remember the day when people called in from across the country saying how you changed their lives. Like they lost jobs, but because of you, they found new jobs doing something they loved to do. I want to thank you for Mannheim Steamroller, and for ’24,’ and especially for Allen Brothers. I just want to thank you for being there these past 20 years.
RUSH: Well, you’ve got a great recollection about things. I had forgotten about The Kennedys in Jeopardy game, and I don’t know that we find it when we were going through any of the archives. But that was hilarious. It was a week-long series based on the TV game show Jeopardy, but it was called The Kennedys in Jeopardy, and it was hilarious. If we’re unable to find it by tomorrow’s program — and we’ve had a couple people working on it…. This has been an arduous project going back in time to find all these things, and we’ve been working on it for quite a long time. We’ll try to find that, also the Judge Hoerchner. If you don’t remember Judge Hoerchner, this was during the Clarence Thomas-Anita Hill hearings, ladies and gentlemen, and they had all these advocates for both Clarence Thomas and Anita Hill come up and testify. Of course the advocate for Anita Hill not only advocated for her, but had horrible things to say about Clarence Thomas. And they had this woman up from San Francisco, Judge Susan Hoerchner. She was like a low-level judge, a little up from Night Court, but a staunch, great lib. Her husband was someone. They were both liberal activists. You’ve heard the description of somebody with a tight butt and this woman is that times ten, and she’s sitting there, and she was just one of these most properly spoken people. In case we don’t have that, I will do my impersonation of Judge Susan Hoerchner when we return from this time-out.
BREAK TRANSCRIPT
RUSH: All right, take yourself back in time, the Clarence Thomas-Anita Hill hearings in that Senate hearing room, and imagine, if you will, a middle-aged woman trying to look like she’s Mary Travers, of Peter, Paul and Mary, whitish blond hair, part in the middle, some bangs over the forehead, sitting as erect as if somebody stuck a pole down her mouth and nothing moves when she speaks. And of course these senators are asking her questions, and when it came time to describe the virtues of Anita Hill, Judge Susan Hoerchner said something along these lines: (doing impression) ‘Senator, Senator, I have to say that Anita is so pure, Senator, Senator, Anita Hill has never had a bowel movement. She has never soiled a toilet in her life, that’s how clean and pure, Senator, Anita Hill is.’ Now, she didn’t actually say that, but she was close. (laughing) She smacked her lips at times, yeah, and Cookie right now is trying to track down actual audio of Susan Hoerchner and we may have it, and we can compare my impression of Judge Hoerchner with how she really speaks.
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RUSH: This is from October 11th, 1991, a little sample here of Judge Susan Hoerchner testifying in the Anita Hill hearings.
HOERCHNER: Mr. Thomas had said to her, ‘You know, if you had witnesses, you’d have a perfect case against me.’ She told me that she was very humiliated and demoralized by Mr. Thomas’ behavior and that it had shaken her faith in her professional ability.
RUSH: ‘Senator, Senator,’ Judge Susan Hoerchner. She was on for a long time the day that she was on, may have even had her back. She was the only thing comical. What she was saying was not comical, it was defamatory, but she was comical nevertheless in and of herself. Kennedys in Jeopardy game, December 3rd, 1991.
(BEGIN ARCHIVE CLIP)
RUSH ARCHIVE: Would you like to play the Kennedys in Jeopardy game?
CALLER: Let’s go.
RUSH ARCHIVE: Are you ready to play?
CALLER: Yes.
RUSH ARCHIVE: Do you understand how it works?
CALLER: Yes, sir, I heard it earlier.
RUSH ARCHIVE: Okay, you have? All right, well, we’re going to get you also a prosecution question. We’re going to ask your knowledge about that which the prosecution may have said. It’s time for yet another exciting edition of the Kennedys in Jeopardy game.
DONOVAN: And now, it’s the Kennedys in Jeopardy game, based on the actual published quotes from the William Kennedy Smith rape trial. And now, here’s your host, Rush Limbaugh.
RUSH ARCHIVE: Thank you, Johnny Donovan, thank you very much. All right, our contestant here is Eric from Syracuse, New York. Eric, here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to play you three statements. One of them was actually made by the prosecuting attorney yesterday at the Kennedy trial. The other two were not, we made ’em up. You identify the right one and you win the grand prize: a Rush Limbaugh coffee mug with a 22 karat signature of me stamped on there. You lose, sorry, it’s only a hundred bucks. It’s the best we can do. You ready to play?
CALLER: Yes, sir.
RUSH ARCHIVE: Here goes.
DONOVAN: One: She was forced onto her back. The defendant was on top of her. Two: She said, ‘Not on the beach. It’s too gritty.’ Three: ‘I never sleep with a man until the third drink.’
RUSH ARCHIVE: Okay, Eric, what is it, one, two, or three? We’ll give you ten seconds to ponder this.
CALLER: I don’t know. That’s tough.
RUSH ARCHIVE: I know. Don’t answer yet. Take your full ten seconds. Okay, Eric, time now. What is it, one, two, or three?
CALLER: I’ll have to guess. How about number one.
RUSH ARCHIVE: Number one is right! (cheers) A wild guess. That just shows this audience, my friends, is indeed up to speed. They know their news. Eric, you have won a Rush Limbaugh coffee mug with my signature stamped on it in 22 karat gold which will help raise your family a long way, a long way toward elevating the values of your —
(END ARCHIVE CLIP)
(playing of Kennedy philanderer song)
(playing of Thank the Lord Rush Limbaugh is On.)
RUSH: It’s the Rush Hawkins Singers: Thank the Lord Rush Limbaugh is On. As we celebrate our 20th anniversary week here on the Excellence in Broadcasting Network. Tomorrow is, of course, the actual 20th anniversary, the 1st of August.