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"If President Obama is as successful controlling the oil slick as he has been with creating jobs, then the Gulf of Mexico is screwed."

"They're looking for experts to try to find out what happened here with this bomb. Well, Obama knows somebody with actual experience in blowing things up in this country: Bill Ayers! So if they're going to appoint a blue ribbon commission, Bill Ayers ought to be the left-wing co-head of the commission."

"I'll tell you what Hurricane Katrina did: Hurricane Katrina illustrated exactly what happens when you have a community totally run by leftists with no checks and balances on it."

"Boy, oh, boy, oh, boy! I'm watching government-controlled media out here. They are on this Times Square bomb that was discovered, and if they can't hang this on a redneck tea bagger, they're going to hang this on the SUV."

"Hey, do I sound spacey today? I got an e-mail from somebody who says I sound spacey, asking if I'm okay. Do I sound spacey to you, Dawn? It sounds like a female thing."

"Yeah, the regime's convicting BP without a trial. Of course they are. That's the whole point. I mean, you have to understand: They have more compassion for Khalid Sheikh Mohammed than they have for British Petroleum."

"Obama's not winning anything by policy. He's running the country by typical Chicago thuggery: bribe whoever you have to bribe, threaten whoever you have to threaten."

"Let me try to put this in perspective. It's a commencement speech. You have a bunch of kids whose parents have gone broke sending them to this school to get their degrees, and the president of the United States is coming in to do the commencement speech. And what does he do? He talks about me."

"Remember, we went into Somalia because of a front page picture in the New York Times of a starving Somali boy with the insects flying over his head. So when this picture of an oil-covered turtle gets out, it is going to change the equation here for the Bamster."

"Newspaper headline: 'Wetlands Survival Threatened'. Two years ago that headline would have been something like: 'Bush Threatens Wetlands' Survival'."



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