"It's twenty-seven degrees outside in San Diego right now. Twenty-seven degrees, and they're talking about global warming!"
"Major influenza epidemic taking hold across much of the country, but there's a curious lack of coverage in the media. That's because the flu is not death via gun -- there's no way to blame conservatives for the flu."
"The cheapest Rolls-Royce is $272,000, but the really wealthy wouldn't be seen in one of those -- that's low-end Rolls!"
"How many people wish they were Gwyneth Paltrow?"
"Hollywood will not support anybody who does a movie that does not condemn waterboarding."
"The left gets away with being portrayed as compassionate, tolerant, understanding, and open-minded, but they are the exact opposite: they are anything but."
"You people may not be aware of this, but I tried being more mellow the first week I was back. You know, I was told that 24-year-old women are threatened by me and my passion."
"I've known for a long time that when people talk about me being braggadocios or bombastic, what they're really saying is that I'm too sure of myself. It just rubs them the wrong way."
"See, this is the difference between me and a lot of people: I don't care. If you want to buy a Rolls-Royce, I don't care. Doesn't matter at me."
"Government doesn't produce anything."
"The highly overrated staff just walked in with a birthday cake. The candles say, 'Over the Hill'. Oh, that's very affectionate."
"Obama has already used executive orders to trump the Constitution two or three times, maybe more. It's a natural thing for him."
"My mistake is always in overestimating the raw intelligence and education and knowledge of people on the left, particularly the media. They don't get subtle, ironic ways of making a point. They don't get sarcasm."
"This is another thing you have to realize: in our country today, the people that run it and the people in the media have a contemptible view of average people. You're incompetent and you're incapable of running your own life -- that's why they have to."
"In a sane world, Nancy Pelosi would be institutionalized. She'd be wearing a white straitjacket, and there would be people really worried about her. Instead, she's an oracle."
"The news media is about destroying opposition to Obama -- nothing else."
"We know that it's not the flu slowing down the economy! We know it's not the flu that has the economy near a standstill. The economy's been at a standstill for nearly four years. What has the economy in a standstill are the policies coming out of Washington, DC."
"My birthday is tomorrow, and the staff knows I despise having a big deal made out of it because, other than in a Third World country or New York City, the only thing about a birthday is that you made it through another year. Everybody has one. There's no great accomplishment in a birthday."
"This is another thing you have to realize: In our country today, the people who run it and the people in the media have a contemptible view of average people. You're incompetent and you're incapable of running your own life -- that's why they have to do it."