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Daily Caller Got It Wrong on Rand and Rush
RUSH: Rand Paul, his office has been calling us since Friday afternoon because the Daily Caller ran a story that was not quite right.  It basically accused Rand Paul of ripping me to shreds over immigration, which he didn't.  He didn't use my name. So his office was calling over the weekend, "Look, Senator Paul wants to talk to Rush and straighten this out."  And I sent word back, "I don't like the phone. I don't like talking on the phone. I really hate the phone other than as a hand-held computer, and don't worry about it.  The media got the story wrong. I have no animosity toward Senator Paul about any of this.  I know that they misquoted what he said.  It's par for the course," yada yada yada.  The media's got that wrong, too, is my point.  They're continuing to spread that. 

Ford Apologizes for Low-Info Commercial
RUSH: Ford Motor Company has apologized -- and I wish they hadn't. This is great. They had a new commercial. Have you heard about this? Ford had a commercial. It's a cartoon-like commercial, a series of drawings. Paris Hilton is in the driver's seat, and the Kardashians are bound and gagged in the trunk. And of course the ad was supposed to be a joke, but it's got Paris Hilton driving the car.

Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney Kardashian are bound, gagged, and stuffed into the trunk as Paris Hilton is gleefully in the driver's seat heading on down the highway. The ad has been pulled because somebody was offended by it. It was the product of an advertising agency called JWT India. They produced the campaigns for Ford cars in India, and the tag line of the commercial was, "Leave your worries behind with Figo's extra-large boot," meaning the car. That's the car, F-i-g-o. Figo.

Ford has apologized for the images, saying it was "the result of individuals acting without proper oversight." I mean, it was the ideal low-information commercial! It had everything that the low-information people talk about. You know, for the low-information people, it is hysterical. The low-information crowd, you know they run around talking about how Paris Hilton's gotta by mad at the Kardashians, because the Kardashians have stolen her media thunder.

So here's Paris Hilton getting even, driving a Ford with a large trunk with the Kardashians in it. Gagged, bound, tied up... (interruption) What else did they apologize for? (interruption) Oh. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Another version aired in Italy with Berlusconi and a bunch of... (interruption) Yeah. (interruption) Well, not "girls," hookers! There's a bunch of hookers in the trunk with Berlusconi driving. That was the one they did for Italy. Ford has pulled both of them. Oh-ho! They don't need to apologize.

Assault After Disrespecting NFL Player's House
RUSH: Now, the NFL player who is the running back for the Cleveland Browns, Trent Richardson, last year was a rookie.  According to the Cleveland Plain Dealer, two women filed a lawsuit on Friday claiming that Richardson and his girlfriend and his brother verbally and physically assaulted them at his home after a game last season.  The incident occurred after the Browns beat the Chiefs in Cleveland on the 9th of December.  They had a party at Trent Richardson's house, and it lasted into the early morning hours of Monday, December 10th.  The two women that were beat up were invited by Trent Richardson's girlfriend.  The women claim that Trent Richardson at one point -- this is all in the Cleveland newspaper -- for you low-information media people, this is one of your papers that I'm reading from. 

The player, Trent Richardson, at one point asked them to leave and that while in the driveway, he verbally accosted them, shouting and cursing that the women had disrespected his house.  How did they disrespect his house?  Folks, the only reason I'm telling you this is because it is again an object lesson into various cultural realities that you and I may be entirely unaware of and totally strangers to.  For one thing, I would never even think in terms of somebody dissing my house.  I just don't think that way.  Somebody could break my window, I wouldn't think they're dissing my house.  "They broke the window, damn it."  If they did it on purpose, then they broke the window on purpose.  Dissing, disrespecting my house.  If you can disrespect a guy's house, you can really get in trouble by disrespecting him, I would think. 

So, anyway, these two women got beat up for slamming a door.  That's the essence of the newspaper story, because they were disrespecting his house by slamming a door.  The player then allegedly slammed a fist into the hood of one of the two women's cars, causing damage in excess of $1,500.  The women claim that as they tried to leave the player stood behind the car and told his girlfriend to come out and attack 'em.  The girlfriend then opened the driver's door and began attacking the two women that she had invited to come to the celebration party.  And then two more unnamed women joined the fray, beating up these two women at the urging of the player, all because his house had been disrespected.  So they're not gonna be dissing anybody else's house after this.  Not gonna be slamming anybody else's doors as a result of this. 

DHS to Buy 360,000 More Rounds of Hollow-Point Ammo
RUSH: The Department of Homeland Security, I don't know if they announced it or if they just did it, but one way or the other they're buying 1.6 billion additional rounds of ammunition.  And the government, various government agencies, have been buying up ammo in great quantities for quite a few weeks now.  And I have seen, by the way, on several conservative blogs people say, "Look, folks, this is no big deal.  It's not really that much ammo when you break it down by the number of agents and the fact that there's target practice." 

I've seen four or five different conservative bloggers try to calm people down.  "It's no big deal. This is really not that much ammo.  It breaks down to like a hundred rounds per agent per year.  That's nothing.  I mean, you figure that some of that's gonna be target practice, firing range duty, this kind of thing."  So the effort is underway to make it look like it isn't that big a deal and that it's actually somewhat common.  But when you add to that that it's creating a shortage of ammo, then people start getting concerned.  And in this current climate, with this particular administration, see, context, again.  Nothing is simply an isolated incident.  People are not that dumb. 

Okay, you have a number of elements that people believe.  A, we have a very activist administration in terms of growing government. A very statist oriented administration, a government that wants to control as much as possible. They want to control life in general, people's lives specifically, health care and so forth.  You add to that they're buying up a bunch of ammo. You add to that a bunch of progressives are trying to get gun bans passed like Dianne Feinstein, and the assault weapons ban, of course that went up in smoke, no pun intended, in the Senate.

In context, in lieu of all these efforts to control guns failing, then what the regime is doing is buying up all the ammo so that the guns that you do have are useless.  Which, of course, then kind of cuts against their theory that guns kill people.  'Cause if you can't get any ammo for your gun, your gun is, by definition of the regime, useless.  So people are quite worried about this.  And further in context, after buying up all of the ammo or a lot of it, now they want to fly drones -- he-he -- over the country, where you can't fire back at the drone.  So people are worried. 

The bottom line, people are very concerned about this.  And when the analysts come out and say, "Don't sweat it. It really isn't that much ammo. It's no more than a hundred rounds or 150," whatever the number was, I don't remember specifically, but the analysts I've seen say, "It's not that much. Look at all the agents we have and the various government bureaucracies. It really isn't that much ammo per agent," and there's a number of these analysts saying that.  And yet people are very, very worried because they know the kind of administration this is.  It's got people admittedly concerned.

UK Schools Ban Triangular Pancakes
RUSH: From the UK Daily Mail, ladies and gentlemen, a school in Canvey Island, Essex, has banned -- are you ready for this?  They have banned triangular shaped pancakes.  "A school has banned triangular flapjacks on health and safety grounds after a pupil was hit in the eye by one during a lunch-time food fight."

Now, I thought the only danger in school was these Pop Tarts shaped like guns, but, oh, no, now we've got pointed pancakes, triangular shaped pancakes that can hurt people in the schools. 

"Dinner ladies at the comprehensive school were told to cut flapjacks into squares or rectangles only from now on after the boy was sent home complaining of a sore eye."
After being hit in the eye with the pointed end of a triangular shaped pancake.  Now, doesn't a rectangle or square pancake also have a point?  So, yeah, at a right angle.  It may not be as sharp a point as a triangle, but whatever happened to good old-fashioned round pancakes?  You can play Frisbee with them if you want and surely that wouldn't hurt anybody. 

The spokesman for the Essex County Council confirmed the ban this morning on triangular shaped pancakes, saying that it was true, the new ruling on pancakes, flapjacks, which have been served at this school for 15 years, was imposed by the head honcho there, Gill Thomas, soon after the incident in the cafeteria last Wednesday.  I think these pancakes must be getting pretty stiff after 15 years.  "The boy complained to staff that his eye hurt after he was struck in the eye by the corner of a flying flapjack, and was sent home for the afternoon, although his injuries did not merit hospital treatment."

Are you kidding me?  Nope, I'm not making this up, folks.  It's happening all over the world.  The progressives are just making a mockery of everything.

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