Send Sheryl Crow to Venezuela!
RUSH: I saw that Venezuela -- honestly -- has a toilet paper shortage. They don't have any. (interruption) Well, that's my point. Send what's her name, Sheryl Crow, down there. She's the one that had the solution for this problem here: Nobody uses more than one square. (New Castrati impression) "Mr. Limbaugh, she wasn't serious!" Yes, she was, Mr. New Castrati. That's what you don't understand. Yes, she was. Use one square of toilet paper.
Venezuela, if they're out of toilet paper... Folks, the environmental wackos ought to be pointing to Venezuela and giving them awards. "This is how you save the environment. No toilet paper? Bad news. Sheryl Crow said use one square every time." One square! What if you have diarrhea? One square. Now they can't use any squares in Venezuela 'cause they don't have any. I would think that would make the environmental pristine. Everything else is nature; the toilet paper isn't.
Now they don't have anything gumming up the works.
Case Against George Zimmerman Falls Apart
RUSH: "The release of evidence in George Zimmerman's murder trial quickly made a mockery of his second-degree murder charges, and threw a further layer of shame upon media and political opportunists who misrepresented a tragic, but fairly straightforward, case of lethal force employed in self-defense." This is a story from the Human Events blog, and basically it is saying that the state has released its evidence against George Zimmerman, and there's no case.
In the Trayvon Martin case, there's no evidence against Zimmerman. I mean, there's no evidence to convict, really. It says here, "It is remarkable to take stock of this evidence and realize that it supports every single aspect of Zimmerman's statement to the police. His injuries are consistent with his account of physical assault by Trayvon Martin. Martin’s gunshot wound occurred at the very short range described by Zimmerman, demolishing fantasies about a racist mall-cop wannabe stalking and murdering an innocent black kid for no reason."
That was the story.
Trayvon Martin was minding his own business, walking through the neighborhood, racist wanna-be cop sees him, shoots him from a long distance, and fakes everything else about a fight and self-defense. It turns out Zimmerman's story has been confirmed. "The Smoking Gun highlighted this bit of eyewitness testimony ... tendered to the police only 90 minutes after the shooting occurred, by a resident of Zimmerman's community..."
Professor Dershowitz, distinguished and esteemed law professor from Harvard, "points out the evidence released in this case means Florida's 'Stand Your Ground' law isn't even a factor in Zimmerman’s defense. ... Dershowitz also mentions a suspicion [that] the charges ... [a]re a political instrument designed to buy time for everyone to cool down..."
Dershowitz said (paraphrased), "You know what? They had a powder keg, so they came up with all these charges just to delay everything and allow everybody to cool off," knowing full well that when the time came, Zimmerman would be exonerated and so forth. But they didn't account for the fact that Zimmerman's life and reputation, family, are constantly under assault and may be destroyed in the interim.
Regime Treats Radical Muslims Better Than Conservatives
RUSH: I want to repeat this story again, given everything that's happening today. It's from The Daily Caller. "The Department of Homeland Security, which under Secretary Janet Napolitano has shown a keen interest in monitoring and warning about outspoken conservatives," extreme right-wingers, people who believe in God, gun nuts, people that talk about the government! Janet Napolitano has warned her department and the TSA and ICE and Border Patrol people: Be on the lookout for these domestic conservative groups.
They're extremists, and they're terrorist oriented.
Be on the lookout!
But when it comes to "pro-Shariah Muslim supremacists," she's all over protecting them. Janet Napolitano is actively working to shut us up, but these true extremists are given every benefit of the First Amendment. "In a checklist obtained by The Daily Caller entitled 'Countering Violent Extremism Dos and Don'ts' the DHS's Office of Civil Rights and Civil Liberties notifies local and national law enforcement officials that it is Obama [regime] policy to consider specifically Islamic criticism of the American system of government legitimate."
It's okay. Put up with it. It's entirely legitimate. If Islamist supremacists come to this country and criticize it, fine. It's entirely legitimate. Do you think any of these groups got yanked around by the IRS? Do you think any Muslim groups applying for tax-exempt status were given the runaround? Do you think they were required to submit the content of their prayers? I don't think so.
Latest on Immigration Bill
RUSH: "House lawmakers..." This is Reuters. There's stuff going on, folks, while you're not looking. This story is one of them. "House Lawmakers Reach Tentative Deal to Revamp Immigration -- Prospects for passage of a major immigration bill improved on Thursday when a bipartisan group of lawmakers in the House of Representatives declared they had reached a tentative deal, resolving disputes that had threatened to torpedo negotiations. The breakthrough came at the end of a two-hour private meeting of seven Republican and Democratic negotiators.
"The eighth negotiator in this so-called House Gang of Eight was unavailable after undergoing surgery on Wednesday. The final sticking point, according to congressional sources, was over whether illegal immigrants now in the United States who gain legal status under the bill could participate in" Obamacare. So, this is the Limbaugh Theorem Republican style. Everybody thinks that amnesty, the Gang of Eight immigration bill, is gonna die in the House. They think it'll pass the Senate and die in the House.
I'm one of them, by the way. I'm one of the people who believe Obama wants it to fail in the House so that he can use it as a campaign issue for the Democrats to win the House in 2014, and then have the House and Senate and the White House under his control, and then there's no stopping him. The Republican push for amnesty has a lot in common with Obama's actions under the Limbaugh Theorem. I mean, look, according to... This is Reuters. We have to allow that it's entirely wrong. It's Reuters.
We have to allow that the purpose here could be to misreport on Republicans so that we get irritated at 'em, but the report is what it is. If the report is true, what's happening here is that at least some Republicans in the House want amnesty to go through, but they have to pretend to oppose it to placate you (their base). So, with all these Obama scandals distracting the public they figure this is a good time to quietly push ahead with their own version of an amnesty bill, which...
I don't know. It's probably similar to the Senate bill. I don't really know what the House bill's details are. But one aspect of the House bill is that illegal aliens will have to wait an extra day longer to vote. Oh! An extra day longer than in the Senate bill. It's right here. Yep. "The final sticking point [in the House negotiation] over whether illegal immigrants now in the United States who gain legal status under the bill could participate in" Obamacare," which frankly, folks, is laughable.
How will anyone be able to deny any legal American the right to Obamacare? Once you put 'em on "the path to citizenship," how can you deny them the right to vote? (New Castrati impression) "Mr. Limbaugh, the law is very clear on this. They won't able to vote for 13 years after being granted the path to citizenship." Yeah, let me tell you, Mr. New Castrati, how that works.
After they're put on this path to citizenship and can vote in 13 years, the next day Chuck Schumer is gonna go to the microphones and practically start crying about how unfair it is, and how un-American it is, that these people are now legal and can't vote, and making them wait 13 years is just cruel. So the push will begin to allow them to vote (snaps fingers) the next day. That's what's going to happen. You know it as well as I know it.
Jeffrey Lord: The Liberal Union Behind the IRS
RUSH: Here's Scott, Richmond, Virginia, great to have you on Open Line Friday. Hi.
CALLER: Hi, Rush.
CALLER: I am calling just to see if anybody has thought about the connection between the union, the public employees union, the unholy alliance between the Democrat Party and the union --
RUSH: Let me tell you something. I'm glad -- I'm glad that you --
CALLER: -- IRS scandal.
RUSH: There is -- I'm sorry, folks, the phones are all messed up today. Callers can't hear me and there's reverb. Anyway, here's the thing. There's a great piece at the American Spectator today. Koko, link to this. It's about Jeffrey Lord. It is a -- it's a long piece, but it's worth reading. It's a great piece that links the IRS workers to the union they must belong to. And the story tells you who this union is, and they -- let me put it this way. They don't like conservatives, as most unions don't. So all of these subterranean IRS employees are unionized, and they have to become -- there's a special -- forget the name of it, but it is an IRS union. And they are -- they are not predisposed to -- to -- to liking us. It's at the American Spectator.com website. Jeffrey Lord with the story.
RUSH: The Treasury union and Jeff Lord writes about this the American Spectator, Treasury union very radical left and very anti-Tea Party. But, folks, none of this matters. There are no scandals, TMZ is reporting Beyonce is preggers with the second child, and that news will dwarf everything else coming out of Washington. Bey is pregnant again, isn't it neat, cool.