Story #1: Police Use Vomit Zapper for Crowd Control

RUSH: This is from Gizmodo.com. Cops have a new way for controlling the crowd. There's a new flashlight out there that makes you throw up. "It's so bright that it temporarily blinds you, and then it gets you all disoriented and dizzy. It uses special types of really bright LEDs. The flashlight's beam pulses and flashes while quickly changing its color, and all this somehow makes you feel like you're going to throw up." Of course, if you want to avoid throwing up, you close your eyes so you don't see the flashlight, but then if you close your eyes you can't aim the gun at the cop or anybody else that is giving you trouble. You can start firing wildly. Intelligent Optical Systems is the manufacturer and they're going to start testing the flashlight 15 inches this fall on some lucky volunteers at Penn State University.

RUSH: A bulletin, bulletin, bulletin, bulletin, bulletin! Breaking news from ABC! It's time, ladies and gentlemen, to stop the check writing in Minnesota. A coalmine in central Utah just collapsed, or earlier today after a 4.0 magnitude earthquake, trapping six miners inside. I'll tell you, the infrastructure is going to hell under the Bush administration. My gosh, mines can't even handle a 4.0 earthquake! What's happening to this country? What do they think we are, Russia? China? (interruption) What do you mean, "Why are we mining coal?" That's a good question. It's a clandestine Bush project, obviously, mining coal to pollute the planet, destroy our climate.

RUSH: We have more health news here. "Moderate exercise like walking may be as good as or better than intense workouts when it comes to certain heart health measures, new research suggests." I don't even know where the new research is from. It's on the second page of this and I threw it away, doesn't matter. "In a study of 240 overweight, middle-aged adults, researchers found that moderate exercise, but not vigorous activity, improved participants' levels of blood fats called triglycerides. Meanwhile, improvements in 'good' HDL cholesterol seemed to depend on how much study participants exercised, and not how intensely. What's more, researchers found, both benefits were sustained when exercisers took a vacation from working out." (Laughing) I've known this even though I haven't known it. I have known this all my life, even though I haven't known it. So I'm going to start changing the way I play golf. I'm no longer going to walk the course. Walking from the cart to my ball will be plenty of exercise based on this latest bit of health news.

RUSH: Hey, here's a story for you, Mr. Snerdley. This is from a Fox television station, Arizona: "A Scottsdale woman who severely malnourished her three children was sentenced to 30 years in prison, the Maricopa County Attorney's Office announced Thursday. Kimu Parker was convicted on three counts of child abuse and received 10 years for each count... 'Thirty years in prison is entirely appropriate for a person who almost starved to death three defenseless children. We will strongly oppose any attempt to reduce this sentence,'" said the state attorney there. "...Parker's 3-year-old weighed 12 pounds, her 9-year-old child weighed 29 pounds and her 11-year-old child weighed 36 pounds," and she had them on "a strict vegan diet."

"This is one of the more heartbreaking cases of child abuse this office has seen in recent times," said the attorney, Andrew Thomas. "We are relieved the children survived and are now doing well." They just got back from McDonald's. I just threw that in. "But we take great issue with comments made by the judge in this case that he may ask the State Board of Clemency to reduce this defendant's prison sentence," because after all they won't have their mother. Of course, if they have their mother, they might die. So it's like the Menendez case. What do we do? What do we do?

RUSH: Bad news for bird cages today, folks. Did you hear about this? At the New York Times, they have cut back the width of their paper to 12 inches. They've lopped an inch and a half off of the newspaper. So there will be less room for lib news, unless they add pages on a given day because of the importance of news stories.

RUSH: AP's Ron Fournier reported, "It is rare to hear Clinton...admit ignorance on a policy issue. But doing so came in handy as she fobbed off the question on Gore." So now it was a brilliant strategy to act stupid! It was a brilliant strategy to be uninformed. It was a brilliant strategy to be ignorant on a policy question. Folks, if you ever have any doubts that the Drive-By Media work in concert to maintain and build these people's images and get them elected, this story alone proves it -- and I've got another one in here that is going to accomplish the same thing. I actually have a story in this stack by some idiot at Reuters, talking in a marveling and admiring way of all the accomplishments of the Democrat Congress. There aren't any accomplishments! The minimum wage is it. But this is a piece designed to muddle the minds of people who read Reuters. It's prop-'em-up time. 

RUSH: Well, we have another study out there, folks. We have another big-time study out there claiming that men who get angry at work are rewarded, and women who get angry at work are not rewarded, and the angry guys make more than the angry women. This just makes the women madder, so it's a vicious cycle out there in the workplace. Add other factors, and the anger multiplies, obviously. There's just nothing that can be done about it.

RUSH: As I reference occasionally, ladies and gentlemen, people say, "Rush, are you sure about this kids business? How much of this is just for show?" None of it is for show. I had this story last week. (I've had this perpetual fear ever since I saw it when I was a kid myself with other families.) We had this story out of Italy where this 61-year-old guy had still not left home and his mother finally kicked him out of the house, and he wasn't getting a big enough allowance. She's doing all the work! He's 61 years old, still at home. So the fear is bankruptcy, poverty -- for me! That's the fear: nothing, destitution. There was another reason. I don't know if you've seen this or not. This is Slate.com: "Rudy Giuliani's Daughter is Supporting Barack Obama -- There's one vote that Rudy Giuliani definitely can't count on in his 2008 presidential bid: his own daughter's. According to the 17-year-old Caroline Giuliani's Facebook profile, she's supporting Barack Obama...designates her political views as 'liberal' and -- until this morning --- proclaimed her membership in the Facebook group 'Barack Obama (One Million Strong for Barack).' According to her profile, she withdrew from the Obama group at 6 a.m. Monday, after Slate sent her an inquiry about it." See? If -- with a capital I and a capital F -- IF I ever became a candidate for anything, I would also not be burdened with this kind of thing: a rebellious, lunkhead kid running around causing me all kinds of problems.

RUSH: We're going to have some global warming news tomorrow but let me tease the headlines:

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