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John F&%$! Kerry Won't F&%$! Apologize
December 8, 2003

On Monday, I took a huge broadcast risk by discussing John the F-Word Kerry's interview in December's Rolling Stone. You see, John the F-Word Kerry was quoted as saying he indeed voted for the Iraq war, but that he didn't expect Bush to "f--- it up as badly as he did." We obtained a search warrant, and produced a recording of John F&%$! Kerry's answering machine, which you can hear in the audio links below.
Even this outburst by the "second-tier" Democrat candidate was looked at as a calculated, cynical political move to compete with Howard Dean for the hate-Bush vote. As is his habit, Kerry blamed this latest political failure on everyone but himself. He even managed to blame Arnold Schwarzenegger, Wesley Clark and the media for his crash in the polls! He caused laughter by vowing to win New Hampshire, but the giggles petered out when campaign aides whispered that the senator was serious - and privately lowered expectations for the January 27th primary.

White House Chief of Staff Andrew Card suggested his home-state senator apologize to President Bush "or at least to himself" for making this statement which, in Card's view, was "beneath John F&%$! Kerry." Kerry's camp swore that, F-no, he won't apologize. Kerry is reported by unnamed sources as quipping, "What is the big F-ing deal?" Meanwhile, the Boston Globe reports that Democrats want John F&%$! Kerry to fire his chief media strategist, Bob Shrum, for helping elect (R)nold governor out in California. This comes at a time when one of the California governor's accusers has brought suit against him for, as John Kerry might say, F&%$!ing up her reputation.
Listen to Rush...
(...discuss the potty-mouthed senator from Massachusetts, John F&%$! Kerry)
(...roll John F&%$! Kerry's "answering machine" message from the archives)
Visit the Rush 24/7 parody archives…
(...for over a hundred side-splitting parodies)
For More Hilarious Parodies…
(...visit Paul Shanklin's website)
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