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Rush’s Morning Update: Washed Out
Original Air Date: March 17, 2009

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Bad news today, folks — especiallyfor you people in the northeast:you see, when sea levels rise, your coastline will suffer themostbecause you(supposedly) caused global warming.

That’s the forecast from a new computer model, published in the online journal Nature Geoscience. On top of the two- or three-foot rise in sea levels, those of you in the northeast will get swamped with another eight inches of water. According to scientists, the coastline up there isn’t designed to handle that increase,so you are in big doo-doo. By the way: this is all supposed to happen by the year 2100.But don’t let that stop you from having a panic attack now; it’ll be here quicker than you think.

Experts are warning it’s not just waterfront homes and wetlands that will be washed out. Large portions of the northeast infrastructure are in the kill zone, including the New York City subway system (which is itself a “kill zone”).

Now, this is bad, folks. Apparently, these scientists are unaware that President Obama has promised during his campaignto lower sea levels all over the globe…or they simply don’t believe he’s going to follow through on it.

So, by the time people with mortgages that are underwater recover,they’re going to be underwater again– literally. Worse, we’re spending billions of porkulus money on the infrastructure, andnow we learn that in a few years it’s all going to be washed down the drain.

Some days…it’s just hard to get out of bed and face the world. It’s just a b-i-itch out there, isn’t it?

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