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“There’s one fundamental reason to vote Republican: It’s 2007, and the Democrats are debating whether there is a war on terror.”

“I want to go over the highlights that were uttered at the debate last night. Here we go: ‘The income gap is growing between the wealthy and the rest of us; I’m going to fix that by taxing the rich. Sure, I’m wealthy, but not the kind of wealthy I’m talking about because I care.'”

“We need to move Gitmo. We need to move it out of Cuber up to ANWR — it’s so beautiful up there! It’s pristine, and you can face Mecca for six months and pray 400 times in a day.”

“The ChiComs have basically said, ‘Screw you! We are not going to pay any attention to your worldwide emissions standards because we have a growing economy!’ I love this: a bunch of communists teaching the rest of the world about economic growth.”

“I’ll tell you what really is upsetting to me: the Democrats are sitting ducks, and the Republican Party is tearing itself apart over immigration.”

“Folks, these liberals cannot be trusted — they simply have Bush Derangement Syndrome. It’s like syphilis in their brains, and I do not have to define that for Rio Lindans. They know what syphilis is.”

“If you go to some of the Democrat websites out there, you’ll find that they think this whole JFK terror plot is a hoax by Bush to get rid of bad news about illegal immigration. This is precisely why it’s important to have an adult in charge who understands the very real threat.”

“When Putin came to office and went to that barbecue down there in Texas, I sounded a warning to the nation and the world. I said, ‘Folks, this guy is KGB — and those people do not change.'”

“Have you read this story about this womanwho drove through a festival in Washington? She was said to have been smoking crack most of the day, and was a temp at the offices of Marion Barry. So we’ve gone from ‘the bitch set me up’ to ‘that bitch mowed me down.'”

“The bottom line here is that to protect nature we have to kill other parts of nature — because the barred owl is an interloper.”

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