CNN Presents the Low-Information Take on Lauren Silberman’s NFL Tryout
Mar 5, 2013
RUSH: Yesterday I told you there are two-ways to analyze Lauren Silberman’s attempt as she tried out for the NFL as a kicker, and she had two kicks. One went 19 yards, the other went 13 yards, for a grand total of 32 yards. That’s two kicks. Then she claimed a quadriceps injury and left. It looked like she never had kicked a football before. It didn’t look like she had any idea what she was doing. She had to ask. It took her ten minutes to figure out how to put the ball on a tee, I am told. Well, maybe not ten, but certainly five. It kept falling off. She’d never done it before. It was a publicity stunt or whatever. I said there are two-ways to interpret this. There’s the low-information way, and there’s the honest way. I did both.
RUSH: By the way, the Lingerie Football League — and they do exist. I love that league, too. The Lingerie Football League provided some of the replacement refs, by the way, during the lockout of the regular referees National Football League. They had a couple from the lingerie league. I kid you not. The Lingerie Football League has announced that Lauren Silberman is not good enough for the lingerie league, that they’re only interested in real football players at the lingerie league. They told them at TMZ. See, I follow TMZ. I’m hip. That’s how I know this. And don’t forget what I told you yesterday. Lauren Silberman said when the tryout didn’t work. “Look, it’s not the length that matters. It’s the technique that counts,” as she trudged off the field. Here’s what I said. Do we have time to get both these? I’ll try. Here’s what I said yesterday about this.
RUSH ARCHIVE: Now, the low-information voter way of reporting this would be to go, “Oh, what a valiant effort. Did you see this lady kicker try out for the National Football League? You want to talk about guts, this is a woman who really is challenging the orthodoxy of the day. This is a woman who is not content with her lot in life and her place in this culture. She wanted to try out for the National Football League, and more power to her. Why shouldn’t she? And she gave it everything she had. She tried. She did everything. She prepped. She worked hard. She did everything possible. It’s just a shame, and, boy, we hope that she can get well soon and come back and kick for real so that we can find out how really good she is.”
RUSH: That’s the low-information voter way of analyzing Lauren Silberman. And, true to form, here it is last night on CNN.
ERIN BURNETT: The media was obsessed with her. Would she be able to live up to the impossible expectations? No. Her first kickoff attempt went 19 yards, her second went 13, both well short of the perfect 60 she was hoping for. But is it really so surprising? As of now, the only requirement to attend one of these combines is a $275 entrance fee and proof you’re eligible for the draft. Lauren had both. Despite coming up short, she should be proud of herself for trying. The fact that the media is now tearing her down is a little unfair since they were the ones who built her up and created this whole stink in the first place.
RUSH: Do I know how to play this stuff or do I know how to play this stuff? What is this “well short of the perfect 60 yards she was hoping for”? She was hoping to kick 60 yards, she barely was able to hit 19, and she wasn’t even able to stay on her feet after the kicks. She fell down. (sigh) I’m sorry. I have abandoned the low-information voter compassionate, understanding, “Gee, we should really applaud her for her effort, ’cause that’s what counts in America now, not success, but effort.” Anyway, do I know this stuff or do I know it?
RUSH: Joe in Los Angeles, I’m really glad that you waited. I appreciate your patience, and welcome to the EIB Network. Hello.
CALLER: Thanks, Rush. I think you’re just the man to find this out, to put my mind at ease along with millions of other Americans, to make sure that Lauren at least get a participation trophy from the NFL.
RUSH: Lauren Silberman?
RUSH: If she got her participation trophy after the event.
RUSH: You have to clue me in. What is a participation trophy? It sounds like you get a trophy for just showing up.
CALLER: Sure, for showing up. Yeah. Kids today get trophies for just playing in a league. At the end of the league, you know, they don’t have winners or losers, everybody gets a trophy for participating. And I just want to make sure that Lauren got hers from the NFL.
RUSH: Well, I don’t think she got a participation trophy, but she got far more than that. She got a lot of publicity. She’s getting a lot of credit in the Drive-By Media for trying. The only negative is the Lingerie Football League said that they don’t want her, that she’s not good enough for the lingerie league. They actually said this. They put out a statement. That’s the only negative that has happened. So a participation trophy. I think she got more than that, Joe. I think she got famous. And credit for participating. Look, fame is the objective in America today, and she got it. So you’d have to say that her endeavor was successful.