RUSH: I must admit, acknowledge, let you know that I will not be here tomorrow. I have a biannual — do you know the difference between semiannual and biannual? (interruption) Yeah. I think semiannual is every other year. Biannual is twice a year. So this is a semiannual charity golf tournament that I attend for the Boys and Girls Clubs of America. There’s a big, big, big dinner tonight at the site of the charity golf tournament. The tournament is tomorrow. Mark Steyn is the guest slave tomorrow here, guest host. Yeah, just funny with the media there. Guest host Mark Steyn will be here, and then we’ll be back on Wednesday.
And folks, I gotta go back out to Los Angeles for another cochlear ear tune-up because I’ve got to get the tune-up to match the progress on this new implant on the right side that I’m pretty sure I am making. Although it’s still mind-boggling to me, my new right-side implant, by itself, just used alone, the brand-new one is still so bad, even though it’s improved a hundred percent from day one, by itself it’s still so bad — well, I could use it in a totally quiet environment with one other person if I were standing two or three feet away from ’em. Other than that — and they still sound, everybody still sounds like the chipmunks speeded up, I mean, dual speed, twice as fast as chipmunks.
But then when I put this left side on, all of that from the chipmunk aspect is still there, but the volume becomes normal, the stereo effect. The improvement is profound. But the improvement on the right side will happen for about — I mean, if they’re right, six months, and maybe longer, and I’m using it every day. That’s what you have to do, use it every day and just train the brain. That side of my brain has not been used for hearing in 13 years. So I’m relearning it in conjunction or cooperation, whatever term they use, with the left side. So the long and short of it is I’ll spend a couple days in LA getting it tuned up. But regardless, just tomorrow we’re not gonna be here.
RUSH: Oh, you mean a hologram? That’s right. If I did a hologram of myself, like they did in Vegas for Jacko, I could make speeches all over the place and never really go. Yeah. That’s not a bad idea, do a hologram. Well, I’m going to look into that. Yep, absolutely.