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“My favorite is still ‘Fire’ by The Crazy World of Arthur Brown. It has everything: chaos, fear, threats, death. Burn, burn, burn!”
“We are giving you what you have asked for — at, of course, a price that contains a considerable profit for us. We make no bones about the fact that we give away cheap stuff and charge a lot of money for it. It’s quality items with a built-in price point that makes it worthwhile for us.”
“Some member of the San Francisco city government said Gavin Newsom ‘just ought to quit; this is outrageous, this is absurd.’ No, it’s not — it’s a resume enhancement. In fact, he’s just following the JFK-Bill Clinton road map.”
“I hope we grow more corn, too. And I hope we discover more oil. You know what? I hope you become a millionaire. Oh, wouldn’t that be wonderful? And I hope the world loves each other someday. I hope we all get along.”
“We have Roger Hedgehog tomorrow — Hedgecock! Gee! Sorry, Roger. I’m just reacting to a picture I just saw on TV. No, I’m not going to tell you who.”
“There’s something missing from this astro chick story: she’s married. She has three kids. Normally the Drive-By Media would have tracked down her husband by now and asked, ‘Did you know about this or are you just learning about it for the first time? Did she ever describe for you sex in a weightless atmosphere?'”
“I think not until any of us have driven 900 miles in a diaper do we really have any right to comment on Lisa Nowak and her circumstances.”
“Do you know something about Bangkok? There are more prostitutes per capita in Bangkok than any city in the world, and I’ve always found that fascinating. Bangkok. Who would believe it?”
“I’m all for alternative fuels, for clean air, and for clean water. But if somebody’s going to come up with a cockamamie idea that is designed to get unsuspecting people to support higher taxes, big government, and clunky lawn mower cars that nobody wants to drive, I am not going to praise their intentions.”
“To hear a bunch of Islamofascists portray Jews as apes and Christians as pigs…That’s pretty mild, compared to other things they do.”

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