Rush Limbaugh

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RUSH: A little teaser here for the Global Warming Stack today. This is just unreal. ?A former Canadian defense minister is demanding governments worldwide disclose and use secret alien technologies obtained in alleged UFO crashes to stem climate change,? and global warming according to a local newspaper in Canada, the Ottawa Citizen. “?I would like to see what (alien) technology there might be that could eliminate the burning of fossil fuels within a generation … that could be a way to save our planet,? said 83-year-old Paul Hellyer. Alien spacecrafts would have traveled vast distances to reach Earth, and so must be equipped with advanced propulsion systems or used exceptional fuels, he told the newspaper. Such alien technologies could offer humanity alternatives to fossil fuels.? (interruption) Well, I know it?s hard to park the things. (Laughing)
Folks, I know what you’re thinking. You’re sitting out there, ?This is ridiculous!? This is typical of the entire global warming movement. This is not strange. You have to understand this. This is not far out. This is just as credible as “carbon offsets.” It makes just as much sense as carbon offsets to fight global warming. You have to understand this. The best way to understand, is this is not strange at all when thrown into the mix of everything else these people believe. This is just a teaser for the Global Warming Stack. There’s much more in it. (Laughing.) I’m stunned. I literally am stunned. I shouldn’t be, but I am, because it’s so clear to me that this whole thing is a hoax and bogus. I’m stunned that so many people have bought into it. I understand the techniques, but it’s frightening to me how many people buy this lock, stock, and barrel.
RUSH: Dadelut dadelut dadelut dadelut dadelut — trumpet fanfare — ha-ha-ha — time for a global warming update.
(Playing of “Fire” by the Crazy World of Arthur Brown)
RUSH: I love that. The Crazy World of Arthur Brown, one of our three global warming update themes in rotation. A snow emergency has been declared in Minnesota, and it’s March! It means that Punxsutawney Phil was lying through his teeth when he said we were going to have an early arriving spring. Plus, you have tornado warnings all over the South and the Midwest — and of course PMSNBC just published the travel itinerary for the body of Anna Nicole Smith on her way to burial. They really did. At 5:30 a.m. tomorrow, the casket will be driven to Miami international airport, board a private plane, and fly over to Nassau. I’m telling you, this country is in therapy.
If you were not here at the beginning of the program, we’ll repeat this: ?A former Canadian defense minister is demanding governments worldwide disclose and use secret alien technologies obtained in alleged UFO crashes to stem climate change, a local paper said on Wednesday.? Paul Hellyer told the Ottawa Citizen yesterday (he’s 83 years old), ?I would like to see what (alien) technology there might be that could eliminate the burning of fossil fuels within a generation … that could be a way to save our planet.? His theory is that these UFOs have gotten here with some sort of super-advanced propulsion. It’s real fast. It doesn’t pollute, because nobody is blaming global warming on the aliens. Oh, I take that back! Michael Crichton has done just that. In a speech, Michael Crichton, to make a point, suggested that aliens are responsible for global warming.

His point was if you believe in UFOs, and if you believe in aliens, you are a prime suspect — you’re an easy target — to believe in the hoax of global warming. Now, when you hear this, this is a real guy in Canada. He’s 83-years-old, and he really thinks that the world’s governments ought to admit that they all have UFOs hidden away! We ought to examine them, find out what propels them — what kind of fuel, what kind of propulsion — because obviously it’s clean and it’s quick and it’s big and it doesn’t pollute. Now, this is not unusual. If you think this is kooky, then correct yourself. This is emblematic of the entire global warming movement, folks. It’s no more outrageous and it’s just as credible as this whole carbon offsets scam.
We ought to go into business at EIB selling carbon offsets. We could become gazillionaires. All we’d have to do is tell people, ?Look, you can buy carbon offsets from EIB and continue to drive whatever you want to drive. Don’t change anything. We’ll handle it for you, and you don’t even have to know what we’re going to do! Just trust us. We will take steps here at the EIB Network to reduce carbon footprints so that yours can remain as large as you want it to be. All you have to do is pay us, say, a hundred thousand bucks. Give us a hundred thousand bucks and you can live guilt-free.? It is time to corner the carbon offset market. It’s just as absurd as this idiot who claims that examining UFOs could solve global warming.
Another story. This is so dear to my heart. This was in the Atlanta Urinal-Constipation on the 26th of February, so two or three days ago. The headline: ?Cars Improved the Air.? This is something that I don’t mention enough. I’ve talked about this over the course of the many stellar years of this program’s eminence. However, it doesn’t come up enough. This is by Dwight R. Lee: ?The motto of all environmentalists should be ?Thank goodness for the internal combustion engine.?? But it’s not, is it? The internal combustion engine is enemy #1, is it not? The internal combustion engine is the target. Fossil fuels are burned by the internal combustion engine! For those of you in Rio Linda, well…you’ve got three or four of them stacked up on concrete blocks in front of your house.
?The abuse heaped on the internal combustion engine by environmentalists was never justified. But a recent story on cow flatulence in the British newspaper, The Independent, makes the environmental benefits from gasoline-powered engines even more obvious. Based on a recent study by the Food and Agricultural Organization, The Independent reports that “livestock are responsible for 18 percent of the greenhouse gases that cause global warming.? Remember we discussed yesterday with Roy Spencer that the greenhouse effect is a natural thing. Many of you believe that the greenhouse effect is something that never existed on the planet until Americans invented the automobile and started driving around and building smokestacks and polluting. That’s not true.

The point is that ?livestock are responsible for 18 percent of the greenhouse gases that cause global warming, more than cars, planes and all other forms of transport put together,? and that is true. ?Long before global warming became an environmental concern, however, the move from the power provided by animals to that provided by gasoline had greatly improved the environment. The emissions that came out of the tailpipes of horses were much more lethal pollutants that those now coming out of the tailpipes of cars. Horse emissions did more than make our town and cities stink; they spread fly-borne diseases and polluted water supplies that killed people at a far greater rate than the pollution from cars and trucks ever have.? That is Oh-so-true.
Our favorite thing, conventional wisdom, says that automobiles, the internal combustion engine had been an environmental disaster. This guy has the gonads to ask, ?Compared to what?? You watch Westerns, and those things are sanitized. You don’t understand that back in the old days when the horse and buggy or the horse was the primary mode of transportation, the ox or what have you, manure was everywhere. It was in the streets. You had flies. You had insects flying around. It stunk. Why do you think the buggy whip was eventually gotten rid of? Human beings are always trying to improve their standards of living. Human beings have always, since the beginning of time, tried to improve their lifestyles. They have tried — and they have sought and they’ve succeeded — in finding a more advanced way of living. It is those advances which are now coming under attack by global warming hysterics, hoaxers and plain, out-and-out liars.
It’s based on the notion that everything in the past was pristine and beautiful. “It was like the Garden of Eden before we came to this continent. Before we polluted it with syphilis and horses and all that, why, it was pristine, and even after that it was all nature. Anything animals do, that’s fine. That’s nature. What man does…” See, we are exempt from nature because we are evil, particularly American men and women. You ought to research this if you don’t believe me, because it is just logical — it stands to reason, and it is irrefutable — that back in the days when horses were the primary mode of transportation… Have you ever been to a horse farm? Have you ever been to a barn? Have you ever walked into a barn? Imagine living in a town that smelled like one and looked like one, no matter where you went! In front of the saloon; in front of the blacksmith’s place; in front of the bordello; in front of your house, that’s what it was. The internal combustion engine cleaned things up, made life easier, and it’s now under attack by a bunch of people that, frankly, folks, should not be given anywhere near the time of day. They still don’t get it, and they don’t want to get it.
(Playing of “What a Horrible World” Algore parody song.)

RUSH: We had a drive-by call from Joe in West Palm Beach. He said, ?Rush, I’m surprised at you. Yesterday you gave us the details of the story…? A Florida legislator wants to outlaw the use of the word illegal immigrants and aliens. She doesn’t like either term when talking about illegal immigrants or aliens, because it’s humiliating and it’s a put-down. Besides this woman who’s from Miami, this legislator, said that aliens reminds her of people from ?out of space.? Out of space. So Joe in West Palm Beach says that we should be talking about “space immigrants.” The guy up in Canada should be talking about space immigrants, not aliens, because you can’t talk about space aliens flying UFOs. Actually, you could because those people are from outer space. You see, they are screwing around with the language again if we’re not careful. Illegal immigrant, alien, this stuff doesn’t just go away when these people propose this. It gets laughed at at first, but it just keeps percolating, if not here, somewhere else.
Get used to it. Get ready.

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