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RUSH: Time, ladies and gentlemen, to once again demonstrate how I, El Rushbo, am on the cutting edge of societal evolution, and you will be, too, if you listen regularly. Let’s go back to last Friday, I said this on my own show.

RUSH ARCHIVE: I totally overlooked this. You know, their press conference coming up soon, the tainted pet food, and they think that they found rat poison in the tainted pet food, the cat and dog food out there. What’s the latest death toll on the cats? Last I heard it was 14. The Drive-By question was, ah, it’s all well and good about the animals, but what about the seasoned citizens out there who have to eat dog food and pay for their medicine because they can’t eat real food and pay for their medicine? How many seasoned seasons have gotten sick eating rat poison tainted pet food? I haven’t seen the Drive-Bys care about it, I haven’t seen the Drive-Bys looking into it, I haven’t seen anything on it, but clearly it’s an area of concern that we all — 15 pets now have assumed room temperature over this. It’s just very sad. It’s just very, very sad.

RUSH: So that was last Friday, yesterday morning on Good Morning America, co-host Chris Cuomo talking with reporter David Kerley. Question, ‘David, what do you hear about these reports about a human victim of this contamination?’

KERLEY: Yeah. This is according to a published report out of Canada, that a Canadian woman tried to coax her dog that wasn’t eating by eating some of the pet food herself. This happened for two weeks. She became violently ill, vomiting, foaming at the mouth.

RUSH: Uh, has this woman died? I haven’t heard about this. But there now has been a human victim reported. ABC had it. I saw the story myself. Trying to coax her dog that wasn’t eating the dog food by eating it — (interruption) well, this is a published report out of Canada. You doubt the Canadian Press? Canadian woman tried to coax her dog that wasn’t eating by eating some of the pet food herself. It does lead to an interesting question, ‘How did she house train the dog?’ Snerdley doesn’t believe this. You think this woman just doesn’t want to admit that she purposely ate the dog food for the food sake of it, and so the excuse that she’s offering is, ‘My little dog wasn’t eating this, and I was trying to get my dog to eat, and I tried to show him.’ You don’t buy that?

You know something, Snerdley, you’re too big a cynic. You don’t understand how some people relate and react to their pets. Pets, particularly when people don’t have kids, are like their children. The pets become their children. If the pets are sick and the pets aren’t doing something right, I can totally believe that there are people out there who would eat something, trying to coax an animal to do the same thing. They have this bond, you know, people form this bond of human relatability to animals and they project their own humanity on to the animal, and they think they can show an animal what to do by doing it — (interruption) of course not, and if I ate cat food, my cat would look at me like I was the biggest idiot! I wouldn’t do it, but I can totally believe that with all the people in Canada, that there is one woman who would. (Laughing.)

You know, it didn’t even occur to me to think that the woman is just trying to save herself some embarrassment, because she ate the food herself but doesn’t want people to think she’s an idiot so she wants them to think she’s a great humanitarian or animal lover trying to protect her little dog by showing it how to eat when it wouldn’t eat. The places your mind goes sometimes. You ought to work for one of these left-wing websites. You would fit in. Anyway, you doubt people can do this? Let’s go back, 1995, on the floor of the House. This is after I had spoken at GOPAC and the Democrats back in ’95 in that heated budget battle were talking about how the Republicans budget was so full of cuts and it was going to cause senior citizens to choose between dog food and medicine. In one of my opening laugh comments in my speech to GOPAC I made mention of this and said that I have big-hearted compassion, I love my mother, and if that’s the case, then I had gone out and bought her a new can opener to make it easier for her to eat the pet food. Pat Schroeder went to the floor of the House of Representatives and said this.

SCHROEDER: And they had the big kahuna of GOPAC come speak, none other than Rush Limbaugh himself, who stood there and said to all these people who paid all this money to keep GOPAC rich, he was hailing the GOP budget. He said, according to the paper and according to the C-SPAN tape, he thought it was wonderful because it would starve the poor, and it would drive Medicare recipients, including his mother to eat dog food but not to worry, mom, he says, I’m sending you a new can opener. Wow. That tells you what today’s about.

RUSH: When I got over to the TV show they showed me this video because I had not seen it during the day, I split a gut. But this is sort of a microcosm for what happens to me on these left-wing websites. They simply have no sense of humor, and especially when the humor is directed at them. I mean the idea that the Republican budget was going to starve kids, as though parents have no control over this, nothing to say about it, just going to let the kids starve, and then that senior citizens are going to have to choose between dog food and medicine. So if you don’t think that it’s possible that one woman in Canada could actually try to show her dog how to eat by eating it herself, you’ve got another thing coming.

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