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“You don’t cry in politics just like you don’t cry in baseball.”

“I want to say to you Huckabee supporters that you’ve convinced me: Governor Huckabee is a true conservative. As a matter of fact, Governor Huckabee was right to increase taxes by $500 million in Arkansas. Governor Huckabee was right to offer in-state tuition to illegal aliens. This is conservative. I have seen the light.”

“I watched a lot of television over the weekend — the debates and the Drive-By Media coverage — and I have to tell you something: I’m getting sick and tired of this whole notion of change. Change what?”

“Did you hear what Mrs. Clinton said on the Today Show? She said that Barack Obama hasn’t done the ‘spadework’ necessary to be president. Whew. Where is the Reverend Sharpton on this?”

“I’ve watched more political TV this weekend than I have watched probably in the last six months combined, and my instincts were confirmed: The Drive-By Media are out to break up conservatives.”

“Let me be blunt: Governor Huckabee does evangelicals a disservice when he uses faith to promote what is a liberal populist’s agenda.”

“Our memories are not that short here, Senator McCain: We remember this amnesty bill like it was yesterday. Our memories are not short on campaign finance reform, either.”

“Mrs. Clinton crying today… That was purely calculated. That was Bill Clinton coaching her: ‘Look, don’t bite your lower lip like I do or they’ll accuse you of copying me. Do some fake tears out there! Show ’em you really care!'”

“I thought you got the money out of politics, Senator McCain? I thought you got all the mean-spiritedness out, but now you’re out there complaining about attack ads from Mitt Romney. I guess we need some more campaign finance reform, don’t we, Senator McCain?”

“Why would Mrs. Clinton all of a sudden cry now? She didn’t even cry coming out of the womb! Coming out of the womb she was screaming, ‘Get me outta here!'”

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