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“Dems must choose between two collapsing narratives: the fiction of Barack the Uniter and the fiction of Hillary the Experienced.”

“I don’t care whether Obama was ever in a pew when Reverend Wright said what he said, because I don’t believe it. He didn’t have to be there to know what this guy was about — he knew him for 20 years!”

“I think I’m beginning to understand why Obama refuses to wear an American flag on his lapel. Can we ask that question? Sure we can, because we’re us.”

“What? What? People are pointing at my face. I have what? I think you guys are mistaking a cold sore.”

“We’re told Obama can unite us all and make us forget our horrible past. But how in the world can we forget our horrible past when his mentor is living as though it were 50 years ago?”

“Folks, who knows what the future is going to bring. Nobody has the slightest idea. We might all be disappointed as hell one morning in November. But I’ll tell you right now: These past few weeks I’ve had more fun than I’ve had in a long time.”

“The superdelegates are there at the convention precisely to make sure that the idiot voters in the Democrat Party don’t screw up.”

“Well, it’s obvious why Mrs. Clinton’s hanging in, don’t you think? She’s hanging on because we kept her alive! No, she’ll never thank me.”

“Barack, I’m going to help you out here. If you’re going to try the lying routine, you’re going to have to get better at it, because the standard for great liars has already been sustained: Bill Clinton owns it, and you’re not in his league.”

“Reggie, I think you’re jealous — of me. You know damn well Operation Chaos is working better than ever I imagined.”

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