RUSH: Let me grab a quick phone call. Chester Springs, Pennsylvania. This is Judd. Nice to have you here, sir. Welcome.
CALLER: Thanks, Rush. It’s great to talk to you. I think today is the best show you’ve ever had. It’s been terrific. I really enjoy it.
RUSH: You know, it’s interesting you say this because I’m setting an e-mail record in the public e-mail account. We’re getting five times what we normally get in the course of the three-hour program on the tire gauge garbage. What have you liked about today’s show, Judd?
CALLER: Well, I’ll tell you, being on hold is terrific because we get to listen to all those bumper things, and those are terrific. And then so you don’t get the commercials, but more importantly, I mean if nothing else, Clinton talking about monogamy being important, followed by Mookie, you know, turning into a social service organization, and this total nuttiness about the tire gauge.
RUSH: It has been a fun show. I’ll have to agree with you, since you put it that way. It’s been frustrating to me, like I’m 57 years old and we’re discussing something that 6-year-olds understand. It’s just silly. I found myself on the edge here of coherence a couple times.
CALLER: Well, Rush, I’m 66, and unlike you, I’ve actually figured out what the strategy is, what Obama’s strategy is. There’s really a subtle nuanced strategy to this tire gauge thing.
RUSH: What is it?
CALLER: It involves an oil company conspiracy, a government program, and a campaign slogan. Now, the oil company conspiracy is known by anybody who’s ever used one of these 50-cent fill up your tire with air gauges at any fast food place or anything. None of those things come close to working. We either put in too much or too little, you know, you have no idea how much you put in, it’s just kind of — you know, the few times I’ve used them —
RUSH: Right. And how do you know if the gauge is even accurate?
RUSH: You can’t trust that, either. Made in China; how do you know?
CALLER: You’ve got an oil company conspiracy here, because why else would they be so inaccurate? The oil companies are obviously putting out this kind of technology that’s going to cause you to either overinflate or underinflate and never have your tires correct. So that’s the conspiracy.
RUSH: Well, what’s in it for the oil companies to do that? Oh, is it like Big Tobacco, the oil companies want to kill their customers?
CALLER: Yeah, of course. Now, the government part of it is, this is going to lead to a government program because now once this problem is identified, and I’ve just identified it, now you’re going to have to have a government program to fix these things, and you’re going to have to have an agency of testers, people to go out and test them, monitor them, make sure they’re working, fining the fast food people who are not taking care of it. So you’ve got an entire government program to make sure, because now that it’s been identified that proper inflation of tires is so important, obviously we’re going to have to spend an awful lot of money in the government on it to take care of that.
RUSH: Tire pressure checkpoints.
CALLER: Absolutely. And he’s going to have a whole agency that helps employment and all the other things. And then the most subtle nuanced thing about the whole process is he gets a campaign slogan out of this, because it’s going to take ten or 15 years for the government to get these pressure things tested and checked and everything else, so in the meantime, people are going to have to either go out and buy expensive hand-held measuring devices, or they’re not going to be able to do that, and that’s going to create a tire gauge gap, kind of like the missile gap that never existed back in the sixties. You’re going to have wealthy people who can afford the tire gauges, and poor people who can’t.
RUSH: No, no wait, wait, wait. You have wealthy people who have staff to use the tire gauge to measure the tire pressure.
RUSH: Minor correction. I just want to keep your mind straight.
CALLER: No, no. That’s why you’re the host. See, I picked out the subtleties in —
RUSH: That’s exactly right.
CALLER: — in what Obama —
RUSH: Well, you were talking nuance. I wanted to stay on line here.
CALLER: So there it is.
RUSH: Well, I could totally believe it. But what I know is true is that somebody was talking to Obama, and he mentioned this tire gauge thing, and Obama, he’d never heard it before, and he went out, oh, really? Well, that’s cool, that’s cool, and then he goes out and says it, and now he’s backed up into defending it, and the Drive-Bys are circling the wagons. I don’t want to start with this again, though. I’m just telling you, folks, do you realize this whole thing is premised on the fact that someday soon we’re not going to need oil. Do you realize what will happen to your life if there is no oil? You have no clue. It’s not just gasoline and motor oil and stuff.
RUSH: Thank you.
CALLER: I just love the humor that has been on your show today and the humor that’s been interjected into the campaign, and I wanted to tell Obama that I learned from my father 40 years ago to check the tire pressure in my tires.
RUSH: Yeah, see, that’s another thing. This elitist runs around assuming everybody’s driving on flat tires.
CALLER: Yeah. I was crazy when I heard that. I laughed all the way down the road. I was like, ‘I never check my oil, and I don’t check my tire pressure.’ But one of the other reasons I called, I must have missed the show where you talked about oil that’s used in plastics, and the screener also mentioned cosmetics. And while I was on hold —
RUSH: Oil is used in candles, paraffin.
CALLER: Yeah, yeah.
RUSH: It’s everywhere. Oil is everywhere. Johnson’s baby oil, K-Y jelly, it’s all oil.
CALLER: Yeah. So you know, I haven’t heard figures on how much is used in that, but I think while I was hold, it just kind of hit me, the cosmetics industry, it would be interesting, you know, if Obama got to be president and said, ‘Okay ladies, you can no longer wear your makeup.’ (laughing)
RUSH: Ah, just have to go to soy-based foundation.
CALLER: He could do away with the makeup industry.
RUSH: I got a woman here who I think wants to list some of these things. Susan in Pasadena, nice to have you on the EIB Network.
CALLER: Oh, thank you, Rush, congratulations on 20 years and twenty years more.
RUSH: Thank you.
CALLER: I’ve been listening to you for 20 years.
RUSH: Thank you.
CALLER: My husband owns a plastics company, and he was just saying the other day if you don’t have oil, everything in your house, everything in your office, there are so many things that are made of plastic that is oil based. And if you look in your office, your computers, your —
RUSH: Trash bags.
RUSH: Ziploc bags.
CALLER: I mean open your refrigerator, the whole inside of the refrigerator is made of plastic. Everything in there.
RUSH: Health food yogurt container.
CALLER: (laughing) But I mean oil is everything. And, you know, I’d love to find a substitute for it, but it’s really —
RUSH: There isn’t. It’s organic. It’s a commodity. And the earth keeps making it. It’s like getting mad at cotton. Getting mad at sugar. But the liberals hate it. They hate a commodity. And look at what we do. We go out and we take a commodity, and we convert it — because we think we’re smarter than God and nature — into something called ethanol. So we create moonshine out of corn, and it’s just causing all kinds of problems, residual, ancillary problems, whereas there’s nothing wrong with the original thing. Just the hubris, the ego of the left is sometimes difficult to deal with.