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“My motto ought to be: ‘He says things that are true, yet unspeakable.'”

“For crying out loud, virtually everybody in Washington politics is trying to destroy me! Now, there has to be a reason for that, and so I ought to just declare myself Man of the Year. I should have won the Nobel Peace Prize, too.”

“I am very appreciative of the invitation I had to the White House last night, because who knows when, if ever, someone like I will be invited back there again — other than for an interrogation.”

“I don’t pay anybody who used to work for the EIB Network but no longer does — they’re on their own.”

“New York City is its own self-contained warfare state, above and beyond and apart from the federal welfare state. But as Tom Wolfe wrote in Bonfire of the Vanities, at some point the people on welfare are going to figure out how to cross the street.”

“I had planned to spend two days here in New York, but when I read the governor’s new tax plan, I said, ‘I’m getting out of here in two hours and 40 minutes!'”

“I wish I could remember who said this: ‘Crime, politics, it’s all the same.’ Maybe if I can’t remember who said it, I will take credit.”

“How many of us would go down the street and ask somebody to give us money — other than the professional homeless crowd?”

“I can tell you what Caroline Kennedy’s qualifications are: She’s JFK’s daughter. She was an Obama team leader. She is a woman. She is rich, and she’s thin, and that’s really important when you’re rich. If she was fat, it would be a problem, but when you’re thin-rich, then you are truly sophisticated.”

“If you don’t have it, you don’t have it, so go out and earn it.”

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