RUSH: This is just delicious. ‘Bodyguards shielding Tiger Woods confronted a golf fan and accused her of being his porn star mistress,’ according to the Sun. ‘Guards accompanying Woods on his comeback at the Masters were given photos of at least a dozen girls with links to the shamed star.’ I have a friend who goes to Augusta every year, he works it, and he’s interviewing potential companions for Tiger. He said there are some 11s running around town this week, not just tens. ‘One [guard] mistook the attractive fan for X-rated actress and striptease dancer Joslyn James on Tuesday and approached her asking, ‘Excuse me, ma’am — are you the stripper?” You gotta wonder how she was dressed. ‘The fan was left speechless until the guard realized his gaffe and apologized.’ He showed her a picture of Joslyn James and said, ‘I’m sorry, ma’am, but you’re a dead ringer for this woman.’ In other words, ‘You’re a dead ringer for a porn star,’ and ‘we have to be very careful here.’ (laughing) Zowie.
RUSH: I want to know when this Tiger Woods news is going to stop. According to Radar Online: ‘Tiger Woods slept with his neighbor’s 21-year-old daughter, having a one-night stand less than a mile from his home. Even as Tiger returns to golf, the wreckage of his secret life of cheating continues to grow larger. A shocking new report says that Tiger slept — I’m not even going to name the woman. Her first name is Raychel. She lives in his Isleworth neighborhood outside Orlando. She’s now 22. She was 21 at the time of the bedding, which actually took place in Tiger’s office, according to this. ‘She recently confronted Tiger when all his mistresses were revealed because she was furious that she was just another conquest.’ Now, it was a one-night stand and she thought they had something going. ‘The National Enquirer says that Tiger and Raychel began making out within sight of his house while Elin was home. They then had sex in a private office Tiger keeps nearby. Staying true to his pattern with other women, Tiger texted Raychel repeatedly after their tryst. But, according to the report, she felt guilty about having sex with a married man and never got back together with him. The Enquirer was first to reveal Tiger’s cheating secret by detailing his relationship with Rachel Uchitel.’
It never ends. It just never ends. First a woman walks on the grounds of Augusta today and they think she’s a porn star and they try to kick her out. They are petrified, they are petrified, folks, that one of these women is going to get in there and cause a scene. Now, Joslyn James, the porn star — I’ve been reading up on this — she has a gig at something called the Stone Pony over in Atlanta this weekend. It’s a well known gentleman’s club. Not to me, but it’s a well known gentleman’s club. Now, I don’t know if you know your geography, but Atlanta is not that far from Augusta. Her gig is late at night, and the Masters shuts down every night about six or seven, whenever the sun goes down basically, so it wouldn’t be much to get back — they’re scared to death this woman is going to show up or one of them is going to get in there and try to make a scene, with cameras, you know, reality TV show maybe hinging on this, book deals. These people guarding Tiger, I’m telling you they’re frazzled. There is so much riding on these guys doing their job right this week. If even one of them gets in there with all the security, whew, there is going to be hell to pay.
RUSH: Yeah, I knew this was going to happen. I was checking e-mails during the break and I got a bunch of questions in there, ‘Hey, Rush, you said you have a friend up at Augusta working the event, and you said he said that there’s a bunch of 11’s in town. Where are they?’ I’ll tell you where they are. They’re at a great little restaurant right across the street from Augusta, on Washington. It’s a restaurant called TBonz. That’s where the 11s are. That’s the place: TBonz. TBonz. It’s T-B-o-n-z. TBonz. what my intel says, and I believe my intel. So if you’re in Augusta, that’s where the 11’s are. It’s a great menu, too.