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RUSH: Folks, I don’t know if you know this or not. I may be, in fact, the first person to tell you this. Do you know that Lindsay Lohan has an obscenity printed on her fingernail? Did you know that? What is our country coming to? Why is the media not covering something just as important as this? This is profoundly important news, Lindsay Lohan with an obscenity on her fingernail while she was in court. I know you haven’t heard about this. That’s why you listen to this show, because I am the first to tell you things people would otherwise ignore.

Greetings, Rush Limbaugh, the EIB Network. Great to have you here. Telephone number, 800-282-2882.

Actually, of course, yes, I’m being facetious. Everybody and their pets know full well that Lindsay Lohan — there’s nothing they don’t know about her. Snerdley, I’m watching this last night, I’m thinking, you know what we ought to do? Just like we have an Official Obama Criticizer, we need to have an entertainment reporter. I’m not going to deign to do it. I am not going to lower myself to do entertainment news, but we may as well go out and hire some idiot who really thinks it’s important, you know, some valley girl type, ‘And, you know, like, wow,’ to come in here and talk about this big news because obviously there’s a market for it. I mean virtually everywhere you go, every cable news channel, every nightly newscast had a story on Lindsay Lohan going to jail. Meanwhile, you can’t find any news about the oil spill. You cannot find any news about it anymore. You cannot find the truth about this Berwick guy and the reason he was recess appointed to be the health care, Medicare, Medicaid administrator.

Do you know why he was recess appointed? He was not being blocked. Normally recess appointments are when the opposing party will not even give the guy hearings. The Republicans couldn’t wait for hearings on this guy. They wanted to expose exactly what a left-wing redistributionist socialist he is and the White House didn’t want that. Four months before the election, the White House didn’t want the truth known about how their health care plan is going to be administered so they recess appointed — this is unprecedented. It is authoritarian, it is quasi-totalitarian. This is essentially another czar that’s been appointed. We know who the guy is, but the administration, the regime, did not want this guy testifying in public. But he was not being blocked. We are not getting any stories about the lack of intellect and experience of Elena Kagan. That’s off the radar. The hate speech of King Shabazz Seliz Skyhook, whatever, the New Black Panther guy in Philadelphia who wants to kill white babies and white crackers, can you imagine if this guy headed up some racist group of right-wingers or white people were saying stuff like this, it would be all over the news. But Lindsay Lohan, we’re getting close-ups of her fingernails with the obscenity painted on there.

Here from Broadcasting and Cable magazine: ‘Oil Spill Coverage Trending Down — The BP Gulf oil spill was the top story among a mix of media for the week ending July 4, but there are signs the story may be ‘losing some steam.”That’s because the regime’s not letting people out there to cover it. The regime doesn’t want any news about this, and of course the media doesn’t really care to cover it if the regime doesn’t want it covered ’cause it’s looking more and more like an absolute regime disaster. And they don’t want any news of this. ‘According to the latest Project for Excellence In Journalism’s (PEJ) weekly news coverage index,’ the BP oil spill, uh, I’m sorry, what did I say we should start calling it? Not the BP oil spill, the private-sector-caused natural disaster. ‘Captured 15% of the news hole, but that is down from the week before, when it had 23% for the number two spot behind the General McChrystal story.’

So we don’t know if Obama’s plugged the hole or if the State-Run Media has plugged the hole on Mother Nature and all these environmental disaster stories. We’re not getting any coverage. But, folks, don’t worry. It’s only the Gulf of Mexico. It’s just a bunch of fishermen. It’s just a bunch of oil rig workers. They’re the ones being hurt and they deserve to be hurt, they deserve to find out what it’s like to have been a minority in this country for 200 years and find out what real pain and suffering is. It’s called payback. We all know that Obama’s pro-environment; we all know that he’s pro-business; we all know that he’s pro-fiscal responsibility. He says so. So why ruffle his feathers with pictures of some oil soaked birds? Obama says it’s the biggest environmental disaster in history. Why beat it into the ground, it is what it is, let’s get our priorities straight.

The rumors are out now that LeBron James is going to pick Miami over New York. He’s got this big one-hour show tonight on ESPN where he’s going to announce his decision. He’s going to announce a decision ten minutes into the show. This story rivals Lindsay Lohan and what she had printed on her fingernails. (interruption) Has LeBron ever won anything? In the pros, no. Are you trying to get me, Snerdley, to wade into the water of whether or not LeBron James is worth all this? ‘Cause I’m not going there. Snerdley says he doesn’t get the madness. It’s not the madness over a basketball player. It is that there’s so much else that is rotten and depressing and unnerving. Sports have always been an escape from the humdrum of reality for everybody else. We are on Fantasy Island with this. Everybody wishes they were LeBron James, they wish they had this kind of opportunity. Now, there are stories coming out of Cleveland today, if he doesn’t re-sign with them, $48 million lost in economic activity every year. If he goes to Miami, remember what I said there, no state income taxes in Florida, and you can’t discount that as part of the equation.

Okay so we got Lindsay Lohan, we got LeBron James and his big decision tonight. We’re not getting any coverage of the serious things happening in this country. In fact, there is a story in The Politico today about the Blagojevich trial and how the White House is sweating it out. But so far they’ve dodged a bullet, because the stuff that’s been learned in testimony, yeah, it might be grazing the administration, it might be brushing up against it but there hasn’t really been any bombshells out there. This is like Walter Cronkite saying there hasn’t been enough coverage of the Vietnam War, blaming everybody else for not — Politico, if there hasn’t been enough coverage of the Blagojevich trial and how it might impact Obama, why don’t you try covering it? Why don’t you tell us what’s going on? I mean, they touch on it briefly, but it’s amazing to watch the State-Controlled Media analyze all the others in the State-Controlled Media and say the White House is dodging bullets here. Why? What bullets? Tell us what they are.

‘Madison Square Shares Fall Before LeBron’s Decision.’ Here it is, and this is from Bloomberg News. Ladies and gentlemen, this is one of the lead stories in one of the leading news websites out there. ‘LeBron James had a meeting with six teams, including the Cleveland Cavaliers. Madison Square Garden Inc., owner of the New York Knicks, retreated in U.S. trading after ESPN reported that LeBron James is leaning toward playing basketball for the Miami Heat instead of the company’s team. James, the National Basketball Association’s Most Valuable Player the past two seasons, will probably announce at 9 p.m. New York time that he will shift to the Heat instead of the Knicks after leaving the Cleveland Cavaliers.’ ESPN is reporting this, they happen to be the one that has exclusive coverage of the big hour long ceremony. How long would it take you, Snerdley, to announce where you’re going to go in your next job? Twenty seconds max. Camera goes on, ‘Hi, I’m Rush Limbaugh, I’m leaving the EIB Network and I’m forming a new network and I’m going over to X. Thanks very much for watching. Now here’s 59 minutes of commercials.’

But no, no. Sports Center, three-hour extended Sports Center leading up to LeBron James’ hour-long decision show and then a two-hour expanded Sports Center after LeBron’s hour-long decision show. They are going to have three people interviewing LeBron James. Going to have Jim Gray interviewing LeBron James, Michael Wilbon interviewing LeBron James, and Stuart Scott interviewing LeBron James, and LeBron James will probably interview himself and answer questions he wishes he was asked but wasn’t. And then there will be post-decision analysis on what this all means for the NBA and what’s it mean for Obama. What does the LeBron James decision mean for Obama, what does it mean for health care, what does it mean for global warming, ’cause everything will relate. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if they have a cut-away to the White House with Obama watching the show and weighing in on his decision afterwards. And then they’ll send somebody to ask Lindsay Lohan, ‘Before you go to jail, what do you think of the LeBron James decision here to play basketball somewhere else?’ And then she’ll just flip ’em the bird with the finger and say, ‘I don’t care. I’m going to jail. Why don’t you cover that?’

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