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“I guarantee you if we could take Barack Obama back to the voting booth, there would be a hell of a lot more people returning Obama than have returned iPhones.”

“There aren’t going to be any middle-class tax cuts. That promise has been broken.”

“We got regulations coming out every orifice there is in Washington and we don’t have any economic growth.”

“Chuck Schumer has produced nothing, not a single job, not a product, not one damn thing. He is perpetually in a hateful state of mind.”

“All this talk of the stimulus and economic growth, nothing’s real, nothing that’s reported in the media is real.”

“Where is Algore defending Apple? Algore’s on the board of directors of Apple. Well, Al’s got his own problems at the moment.”

“It used to be that American representatives and senators worked for you. It used to be that it was a pleasant thing to encounter a government official. Now it’s a risk.”

“The whole concept of free will, I’m big into it. We have free will. There are consequences to our actions. And the best behavioral control there is, is a wife.”

“Would somebody explain what ‘obesity screening’ is? It’s a mirror, isn’t it? Maybe some scales? Maybe a pair of glasses? Some people may have to go to a truck stop to get weighed?”


“Our current health care thinking is tobacco is the worst thing in the world for us, but marijuana is medicine and should be provided for us by the government.”

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