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“You know, your butt has been kicked so often, Senator Reid, it’s amazing that you have the ability to sit down pain-free.”

“I have to laugh, folks, at this Associated Press story: ‘Clintons says she’ll give up some powers if elected president in 2008.’ What kind of idiots do you people at the AP think we are?”

“Any governor or mayor or councilman with any degree of competence knows that states and localities are best at dealing with this kind of disaster. Their first actions are not to call Barbara Boxer; their first actions are to attack the fires.”

“It’s your job to protect yourself in the first place. If a fire comes to your house, are you going to sit there and burn to death waiting for the government to show up, or are you going to get the hell out? Come on!”

“One, two, three, four, five. Damn it! I didn’t get to ten! Have you ever heard of the Constitution, Jason? I’m on the verge of a nuclear explosion here at the EIB Southern Command!”

“Ladies and gentlemen, let me begin here with an apology to you. There were a couple of occasions during the previous hour where I lost my famous composure. I got a little angry, and it was conduct unbecoming of your host.”

“Wait just a second here, Dan. You’re a truck driver: salt of the earth, flannel shirts rolled up. You’re steaming on down the highway in your 18-wheeler. Where were you watching The View?”

“My God. Every standard that we’ve come to know in this country is under attack.The View on at a truck stop?”

“I think it’s time to bring the firefighters home. It’s just too dangerous. They’re over there on a false premise anyway, that they can put out the fire. We can’t win against the fire, folks, just like we can’t win in Iraq.”

“It bothers me that so many people have to see that the government is doing something before they feel like things are under control.”

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