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“Nobody does dirt better than the Clintons, but the only reason they do better with dirt is because the Drive-By Media helps them with it.”

“If there was somebody in the world that had more inevitability about his electoral future than Mrs. Clinton, it was Hugo Chavez — and yet he lost! Interestingly, he also has the same initials as Hillary Clinton: H. C.”

“Socialism just doesn’t work and it’s not inevitable — despite leftists in this country and around the world trying to make everybody think that it is.”

“What? This can’t be. The Dixie Chicks singer is starting a defense fund for convicted child killers? Tell me I’m not reading that correctly. Wow.”

“Barack Obama’s just been accused of running a slush fund by the Clintons! If Barack Obama had the onions, folks, he would stomp Mrs. Clinton on this. She is the last person in the country to talk about ethics and money in the same sentence!”

“I want to warn you Huckabee fans: It isn’t going to be long before he’s going to be characterized as a Bible-thumper and somebody who would bring his religion into the Oval Office. They are going to build him up only to knock him down.”

“You know, in the old days… I can’t believe I’m saying this. I’m 56 years-old, and I can’t believe I’m saying, ‘in the old days.'”

“The biggest threat to Mrs. Clinton is that she has to pull off an act for about another year, and that act is not answering a question — and trying to make sure she doesn’t cackle.”

“Snerdley just asked me, ‘What is Maureen Dowd unhappy about?’ Actually, the way to frame that question is: ‘What is she happy about?’ That would take much less time to answer.”

“Such a great song: I Started a Joke by the Bee Gees. A great song for the mentally disturbed, but nevertheless a great song.”

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