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It’s Open Line Friday!

by Rush Limbaugh - May 19,2011

“Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is the Lindsay Lohan of the Middle East. He just wants a little attention, some help.”

“Whatever the Democrats do, we have no choice but to defeat these people — the terrorists. That’s the clarion call that Winston Churchill kept trying to get the British people to understand, but the liberals of his day were just like the liberals of our day — they didn’t want to deal with it.”

“I met Gorbachev at George H. W. Bush’s 80th birthday party. Two pictures were taken, and in one of those pictures the birthmark ended up on my forehead. It was one of those big, big mysteries.”

“Psychotic illnesses, for those of you in Rio Linda, include schizophrenia and disorders with such symptoms as hallucinations or delusions. In other words: normal for you.”

“The opportunities have never been better here in America, and they’re boundless. But you have to go get them. They’re not going to come knocking on your door because they feel sorry for you.”

“If you put it off, you’re only going to have to deal with it later — be it Hitler or be it Al-Qaeda or be it any enemy that you have. You just can’t wish bad people away.”

“All right, this is one of those times where if your young children are listening with you, you might want to turn the radio down. ‘The Japanese love technology so much that now even their sex toys are on the cutting edge.’ Wow, Snerdley! You’re looking jazzed in there!”

“Of course, a dog will do anything to protect its homestead and its master. But the cat would eat you if it were big enough.”

“The astronauts could just deny ever drinking: ‘I never had a drink with that woman, I never had a drink with myself. I just want to get back to work for the American people and fly my missions.’ They could also say, ‘Everybody does it — look at all the airline pilots.'”

“Every day in America is better than the day before. I’ve known this since I was ten — that’s why I always wanted to be older.”