Rush Limbaugh

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“If President Obama is as successful controlling the oil slick as he has been with creating jobs, then the Gulf of Mexico is screwed.”

“They’re looking for experts to try to find out what happened here with this bomb. Well, Obama knows somebody with actual experience in blowing things up in this country: Bill Ayers! So if they’re going to appoint a blue ribbon commission, Bill Ayers ought to be the left-wing co-head of the commission.”

“I’ll tell you what Hurricane Katrina did: Hurricane Katrina illustrated exactly what happens when you have a community totally run by leftists with no checks and balances on it.”

“Boy, oh, boy, oh, boy! I’m watching government-controlled media out here. They are on this Times Square bomb that was discovered, and if they can’t hang this on a redneck tea bagger, they’re going to hang this on the SUV.”

“Hey, do I sound spacey today? I got an e-mail from somebody who says I sound spacey, asking if I’m okay. Do I sound spacey to you, Dawn? It sounds like a female thing.”

“Yeah, the regime’s convicting BP without a trial. Of course they are. That’s the whole point. I mean, you have to understand: They have more compassion for Khalid Sheikh Mohammed than they have for British Petroleum.”

“Obama’s not winning anything by policy. He’s running the country by typical Chicago thuggery: bribe whoever you have to bribe, threaten whoever you have to threaten.”

“Let me try to put this in perspective. It’s a commencement speech. You have a bunch of kids whose parents have gone broke sending them to this school to get their degrees, and the president of the United States is coming in to do the commencement speech. And what does he do? He talks about me.”

“Remember, we went into Somalia because of a front page picture in the New York Times of a starving Somali boy with the insects flying over his head. So when this picture of an oil-covered turtle gets out, it is going to change the equation here for the Bamster.”

“Newspaper headline: ‘Wetlands Survival Threatened’. Two years ago that headline would have been something like: ‘Bush Threatens Wetlands’ Survival’.”

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“The choice in the upcoming elections boils down to this: It’s either Obama and the Democrats or America. You can’t have both.”

“I’m getting e-mail: ‘Rush, are you that hard up? You’re doing the Family Guy for money?’ Folks, I don’t even know what I got paid to do this. Whatever it is, it’s union scale. Besides, I didn’t do this for the money — I did this for the fun of it.”

“Notice how nobody in the Tea Party — or even anybody in the GOP –tells the voters how stupid theyare like the Democrats always do?”

“Family Guy has their own built-in audience, and, you know, it’s not everybody’s cup of tea. I mean, this program crosses a line every night that it’s on. It runs up to the border and goes over it. But I like Seth. And what the hell.”

“You people that have never played golf? You don’t understand. They ought to make prisoners play the game, that’s how frustrating it is.”

“Obama and Carville, I think, would be a perfect team to greet aliens. I mean, Carville looks like he was born on a UFO. They could be the official greeters: Dumbo and Gumbo.”

“Let me ask you a question that every worker, every employee, and every associate in the private sector needs to ask himself: How does the government confiscating more money from your employer help you?”

“A $700 billion ‘stimulus’ is like throwing a penny in Lake Michigan and hoping it ripples all the way up to Canada — it isn’t going to happen.”

“Look, on paper, Sarah Palin’s exactly what the NOW gang and the rest say they’ve always wanted. She has it all. She is at the pinnacle of a political career, and she has a loving and doting family and husband. She’s everything the feminazis told women they could be, and yet they try to destroy her.”

“I’m hoping the Democrats lose a hundred seats — that’s my hope and change! I want them wiped out. I want them shellacked.”

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“It’s Martin Luther King Day today. I wish somebody would’ve reminded me, I would’ve taken the day off. Do you realize they’re gonna accuse me of being a racist for showing up to work today?”

“Now, this Tucson guy who threatened a tea partier,Eric Fuller, is getting a mental evaluation… and yet Frank Rich and Paul Krugman and Matt Bai of the New York Times are all walking around free.”

“How could Obama sit in a pew in Reverend Wright’s church, listen to the rantings of Reverend Wright for 20 years, and not demand he get a mental evaluation?”

“The Democrats want to do what Hugo Chavez has done in Venezuela. They want to make it a crime to complain about government policy. Actually, they’ve been trying to criminalize political differences for as long as I’ve been doing this program, but now they’re brazen about it.”

“The media is attacking you, too, when they say this stuff. They’re saying that you are all capable of doing what Jared Loughner did because you listen to this show.”

“What people remember about the Tucson memorial is not what Obama said. They remember the atmospherics, they remember the cheering, and they remember the pep rally feeling that a supposedly somber memorial had.”

“Folks, have you ever noticed how the push for civility is in inverse proportion to how well the Democrats think that they are winning the national debate?”

“To the left, civility does not mean that we tone it down. Civility does not mean that we act polite. Civility does not mean that we do an NPR impression. Civility means we shut up.”

“What right does the government have to tell an industry how much of its revenue it must spend on anything? Telling them that they must devote 80% of their profits to X? Obama has no right to do that. It’s totally unconstitutional.”

“Oklahoma City was not the first time a president tried to personally blame me for an event like this, and each time what gives me strength is knowing that you all don’t buy it.”

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