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Rush Limbaugh

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RUSH: Folks, let me give you the benefit of my logical thinking and wisdom here on a couple things that seem to have people all tied up in knots, and there’s no reason to be tied up in knots about any of these things. First Tiger Woods. This is not hard to understand. On Wednesday, the National Enquirer publishes a story saying he’s having an affair with a woman named Uchitel, who is apparently well known for flagging down sports celebrities and having relationships with them.

On Friday with them at 2:30 we learn that 12 hours earlier — Friday morning at 2:30 — Tiger Woods is found lying on the street unconscious with lacerations on his face, his car having run over a fire hydrant and hit a tree. He’s in and out of consciousness. Two windows of his SUV are bashed in, and the 911 caller says, ‘I don’t see his wife, and I don’t see him wearing shoes.’ What do you think happened here? Now, the two people that snuck into the White House and supposedly crashed it, this is not hard to understand. And the White House is giving us a huge bit of distraction with this which is why I’m getting out of the way here. This bunch is so much here, it’s so simple if you just know some baseline facts. In the first place this woman wants to get on this Bravo show The Great Housewives of Washington DC, the Real Housewives or whatever it is.

Bravo is owned by what? NBC. Jeffrey Immelt is what? The CEO of what? NBC. Which owns Bravo. These two people just happen to go into a White House state dinner when their names are not on a list and they happen to get up and get their picture taken with Obama. And now the Bravo brand, the Bravo network, everybody knows what it is when only a few hundred thousand knew what it was beforehand. When you also know that Jeffrey Immelt is in bed with Obama on ‘green’ technology and government grants to GE to promote that business, it all begins to make sense. Then when you find out that these two showed up on the Today Show today saying they were invited, that somebody in a liaison post over at the Pentagon invited them and they’ve got proof — and now their friends are saying, ‘Yeah, they were invited,’ and they’ve given the e-mails to the Secret Service.

And then when you find out that the same couple crashed a Congressional Black Caucus dinner back in September going into the busboy entrance. And then when you realize that nobody gets into the White House without somebody knowing it and approving it, it’s very simple to understand what happened in both the Tiger Woods story and in this. Somebody wanted those people in there at the White House — and they got there and they’re getting all the attendant publicity — and Obama is getting a giant distraction out of it as people focus on that and the Tiger Woods story while Obama’s, you know, sneaking around with his other agenda while nobody’s looking.

Except me. I just dealt with this in five minutes, where most cable networks are devoting a whole day to these two stories. It’s not hard to figure out what happened in any or either of these cases. It’s not. Snerdley, do you disagree with any of this? I’ve given you a logical timeline with a baseline of information. Once you have that, then it all falls into place. It all makes perfect sense. Then when you add the latest tidbit, ‘no shoes, driving the SUV’? (snorts)

BREAK TRANSCRIPT

RUSH: It’s amazing how times change when certain leaders are on our national stage change. Back during the Clinton-Lewinsky era it was, ‘Ah, everybody does that. Everybody has affairs, everybody has sex, it didn’t distract him from his work,’ da-da-da-da. Now with Tiger Woods, oh, it’s horrible to have affairs now. It’s officially bad to have affairs. No more ‘everybody does it and if it doesn’t affect his job, it’s none of our business, it’s just sex. It’s just sex.’ I love the sports media. The sports media is out there, ‘He doesn’t owe anybody an explanation, but he ought to tell us anyway.’ That’s basically to sum up what the sports media is saying, ‘Oh, yeah, he has a right to remain silent, but he should tell us something even though he doesn’t have to. I mean, we’re the media. We should have a statement from him here otherwise he’s going to lose control of the story.’ It’s just amazing.

BREAK TRANSCRIPT

RUSH: I was just watching MSNBC on Tiger Woods: Is he going to have problems with his endorsements here because of this episode? Then they ran a graphic that said he’s the first athlete to earn $1 billion. And I said, ‘He’s only got about $400 million of it. I mean, the rest of it went to taxes and so forth.’ It’s not that big a deal. If I ever earned a billion dollars, I would be… (sigh) That would be $600 million in cumulative taxes he’s going to pay on that billion dollars if in fact he’s earned it. At any rate, I’ve been looking for a way, ladies and gentlemen… (Did he really say he’s ‘only’ got $400 million? Yeah, I said that.)

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