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“If we could discover new energy supplies as easily as the Drive-By Media discover new spins on Mrs. Clinton, we would be energy independent in a week.”

“Driver’s licenses for illegals in New York is all about one thing: voter fraud. They need those voters, they want those victims.”

“Mrs. Clinton was waffling all last night, and yet it was like they were still afraid to move in. Although, we have to understand: This is a woman who dispatches people to go steal FBI files, so who knows what she’s got on these guys.”

“Folks, that answer about illegal immigrants is going to haunt Mrs. Clinton. She was really, really mad. You should have seen her — the steely look in her eyes.”

“I wonder if Dennis Kucinich will make the next debate;I bet whatever network has it will want him back just for the entertainment factor.”

“I just marvel at how people think that this woman is so brilliant… If Hillary has any talent whatsoever, aside from ‘bimbo eruptions’ and handling all that, it is how she avoids answering a question.”

“These two people — Bill and Hillary Clinton — are obsessed with money, and the evidence is that they can’t stop telling us how much they have. And that, folks, is not classy.”

“Why does Hillary worry about her National Archives documents being released? Sandy Burglar can go get them before anybody!”

“Dennis Kucinich, presidential candidate, said he saw a UFO, but has questioned President Bush’s mental health in light of comments he made about a nuclear Iran precipitating World War III. That’s just rich, isn’t it? That’s just really, really rich.”

“Diplomacy is fine and dandy in certain instances, but it’s not how you deal with tyrants, it’s not how you deal with oppressors. It’s not a magic wand that will make the world safe.”

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“‘Swiftboating’ is telling the truth about somebody, generally the truth about a Democrat.”

“You all know that Mark F. Lee Levin (my nickname for him) is a very close friend of mine, and, of course, I am the reason why everything good that has happened to him has happened to him. He knows it, and he’s highly appreciative of this.”

“Now Hillary’s team is debating what color her pantsuit should be in the next debate: Should it be black to show power? Or should it be pink or orange to show lady ruffles? Oh, they’re really going there, Dawn — they are.”

“‘Do you think I’m sexy?’ What a bump song to play during a discussion of Hillary Clinton! Ha, ha, ha!”

“I got this e-mail yesterday: ‘Dear Rush: May not be your cup of tea, but we would like to send you a real live pet tarantula.’ Tarantulas. Didn’t Ernst Stavro Blofeld try to kill James Bond with one of those?”

“Who was given the task to nationalize one-seventh of the US economy? Hillary Clinton. Who was it who stage-managed the Paula Jones lawsuit and botched it? Hillary Clinton. That’s her experience, primarily.”

“We’ve shown the Republicans on this show how to take the Clintons off stride and not end up in Fort Marcy Park — yet.”

“When I was watching that NFL/NBC halftime show and they turned the lights out, I got on the Internet and started looking at 12-cylinder automobiles that I still don’t have. And if Cadillac made one, I would have bought it on Monday!”

“You know, one of the stars on the flag may as well be for the public school system. Well, that’s how people look at it! It’s just as much a part of America as apple pie and razor blades in candy on Halloween.”

“Boy, they hate me up in Alaska.”

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“The pope’s speech was just uplifting to me; I take this stuff personally. I love this country, and I love anyone else who loves this country.”

“As your Commander-in-Chief US, Operation Chaos, I’m looking out over the battlefield. Mrs. Clinton’s in trouble, and something that I never anticipated may be necessary:mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.”

“I heard The Battle Hymn of the Republic start, and I told Cookie up in New York, ‘Get me the song. I want the song as part of the audio sound bites.’ She asked, ‘You can hear it?’ I said, ‘I can always hear God’s music.'”

“Jack Cafferty is the guy wearing the dirty raincoat in the city corner — he hasn’t shaved or showered in three weeks, and he’s yelling obscenities at the people who walk by.”

“The idea that Islamic terrorists join Al-Qaeda because they’re economically poor… it’s the exact opposite! Bin Laden is a billionaire. Zawahiri was a doctor. Economics has nothing to do with it; they resent freedom — we’re infidels.”

“Can you imagine somebody thinking a dictator ‘speaks for all the people’, like Jimmy Carter does? President Carter, in a dictatorship, the people don’t have a voice — other than screaming for their lives.”

“In the same way that they demand equal time after the president’s State of the Union address, will liberals demand equal time after the statements of the pope? Don’t laugh.”

“We say this a lot, but elections really do matter, folks. We elected Jimmy Carter 32 years ago — and he’s still causing trouble! He’d be better off if he was still hammering nails at Habitat for Humanity.”

“Look what you can do if you grow up on food stamps! You can go to Harvard Law and meet some sleazy real estate guy to help you buya house that you can’t afford, and then you’ll run for president with absolutely zero qualifications!”

“Neil, it’s great to have another one of you hicks on the program with us. Well, do you go to church and have a gun? Yes? Then you’re a hick.”

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“What would be ‘real change’ in this country? Because Obama ain’t it. More liberalism is not real change.”

“The easiest way out of this today for Senator Stevenswould beto simply announce a party switch. Congressman William Jefferson (Democrat-Louisiana) set the standard for the appearance of criminal behavior: Don’t resign and accept the protection of fellow Democrats and their willing accomplices in the press.”

“Jennifer, if you’re really suffering from high blood pressure, why are you even listening right now? You may be committing a slow form of suicide here on purpose, and that’s not right.”

“There is a new single by the rapper Ludacris. Now, in this song, Ludacris basically says that Hillary is a b-i-itch and thatMcCain ‘don’t belong in any chair unless he’s paralyzed.’ I suggest that the Obama camp keep this coming. I do. We need more of this.”

“The House yesterday issued an apology to black Americans for slavery and Jim Crow segregation laws. I wonder if Congress will apologize to me for using the power of the federal government to intimidate my syndication partners into essentially silencing me?”

“I don’t think that The Messiah, Lord Obama, went to the Western Wall to leave a prayer at all. He probably heard that people go to the Western Wall to send messages to God, so he showed up and said, ‘I’m here to pick up my mail.'”

“My mother called and told me that my Dad, when he got to the first Nightline commercial break after I was on, took off his glasses and said, ‘Where in hell did he learn all this?’ And my mother looked back at him and said, ‘From you, silly.'”

“Senator Clinton’s campaign launched a contest to pay off her remaining campaign debt: the grand prize is a dinner for you and a guest with Hillary Clinton herself. Second prize is you get to have two dates with Hillary. Just kidding!”

“If you were homeless, would you want an advocate for your circumstance? Those advocates never tried to get them out of their circumstances. They just exploited them and gave them a shopping dart — and then they realized some shopping carts have trouble at curbs.”

“‘I have become a symbol of the possibility of America returning to our best traditions’? What ‘best traditions’, Obama? Massive tax increases?”

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“Democrats don’t have a Sarah Palin. She’s twice the man Obama is.”

“The left’s trying to force Palin off the ticket. I know how mad you people are about this, but I want to tell you: they better have those rafters reinforced at this convention hall tonight — because Palin’s going to blow the roof.”

“I don’t think the Democrats put the country first. I think they put socialism first, liberalism first, and their own power first.”

“It was really stark: every speaker was able to tell moving aspects of John McCain’s life. Thompson told McCain’s story like I had never heard it told before, and not one speaker at the Democrat convention was able to say anything remotely close to that about Obama.”

“The left destroys people who are threats to their template, to their narrative, to their power. They take no prisoners. They have the Drive-By Media with them, the Washington governing class, and the Democrat Party. It’s a three-headed beast — that’s what we’re all up against.”

“My e-mail account is smoking as I’m sure the phone lines are smoking with reaction to ditz Sally Quinn. And let’s not forget that Sally Quinn is of Georgetown and known mostly thanks to her husband.”

“You libs talk about Sarah Palin not having enough time with all those kids running around? Last I checked, Bill Clinton had relationships on the side while he was in the White House — plus a daughter in the White House, plus a wife running around.”

“Let’s go through the list! Let’s find out how many kids all these Drive-By Media babes have and find out how it is they still do their jobs and not be distracted by their families! Well, they seem to think they’re just as important as the vice president!”

“Sarah Palin has a value base that scares the hell out of these people because it reminds them of their failures to destroy the values that create families like Sarah and Todd Palin’s — and McCain’s.”

“This is kind of like shooting ducks in a barrel here, folks. Or fish in a barrel. Whatever is in the barrel that you shoot — Sarah Palin would know.”

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“If the GOP allows itself to be trapped in the false premise that it’s racist and sexist and must show the world that it isn’t, then the GOP is extinct.”

“You know what we need? We need somebody on the Supreme Court who was a bondholder for either General Motors or Chrysler who can sympathize with how the bondholders are getting shafted here. We need somebody with empathy.”

“I just got an e-mail: ‘Rush, we have to choose our battles. This nomination was manipulated and staged for votes, but it will bite us in the butt if we fight.’ So what this e-mailer is saying is: ‘Obama chose this woman to shut us up, and so we better shut the hell up.'”

“Bush’s administration was more diverse racially and ethnically than any administration in history, and what did it get him? Nothing but abject hatred and derision.”

“We conservatives, we really do have the best arguments. We have the most responsible policies. We have the most humane principles, too. And that’s why we have to keep it up.”

“What do the moderates offer? They just repeat their platitudes and tell us to keep quiet. They don’t even want the debate because they don’t even know what principles they will surrender.”

“The reason Colin Powell enjoys a 70% approval rating or whatever is because he doesn’t specify where he falls on any issues. Well, hell’s bells, folks! I could probably be loved by 70% of the people if I didn’t have an opinion on anything!”

“I’m an enlightened individual, and an enlightened individual is one who seeks the truth. Barack Obama is not an enlightened individual, though. He is a narcissist.”

“Obama looks at the Constitution as something that reels him in, so, to him, the Constitution either has to be changed or it has to be ignored. And the easiest way to change or ignore the Constitution is via the judicial system, particularly at the highest level: the Supreme Court.”

“We have to assume that Sonia Sotomayor has a tax problem simply because she’s an Obama nominee.”

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