Rush Limbaugh

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“Major news organizations are reporting that Governor Christie is going to say again that he is not running. This will leave Bill Kristol of the Weekly Standard stranded at the altar once again.”

“Government doesn’t have any money until it goes and gets it from other people.”

“The Durbin amendment was tacked onto the already stupid Dodd-Frank bill at the last minute and that’s what caused these debit card fees to increase at Bank of America in the first place. So if you object to this new $5 fee, your real target should be to send Dick Durbin home.”

“I happen to know the pressure was on Governor Christie to run, and I’m not talking about Bill Kristol. Big money people were leaning on him like you can’t believe, like the Home Depot co-founders and so forth.”

“Maybe I’m suffering from iPhone rage. I’m ticked off there’s not an iPhone 5.”

“We face a delusional enemy! You can’t oppose these people rationally.”

“Joe Bite Me was on our affiliate on the radio in Tampa, and somehow the subject of Van Jones came up and Biden said, ‘Who is that?’, Biden said he had no idea who Van Jones was. He was just the “green jobs czar” for your administration; and Biden said, “Oh, really?” Biden didn’t know. Still doesn’t know who Van Jones is.”

“In many cases today the most offensive thing anybody can say is the truth about something. Political correctness was created to mask and hide the truth.”

“The reason people aren’t repaying their loans is because they don’t have jobs, Mr. Obama. The reason they’re not able to go out and engage in commerce and grow the economy is because they don’t have jobs, Mr. Durbin. You want people to repay their loans, you want businesses to start hiring people, leave them alone.”

“It is no accident — although it is bad political manners to mention it — that the two most prominent women in the Republican party today, Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann, are trim and attractive.”

“I’m gonna defend the private sector against this kind of meddling from incompetent boobs in the Democrat Party every day I’m on the air; and I’m gonna try as best I can to tell you that every time your cost of living goes up or every time expenses go up at places you do business with, odds are it’s because the government’s got involved and is making it more expensive for these businesses to operate.”

“I did lose my cool today at a caller for the first time in probably 15 years. I have to admit. I feel rotten about it cause the caller was a nice guy.”

“I don’t know about presidents, but there are lots of ugly politicians. Remember: Politics is show biz for the ugly. It’s where people who can’t get on television or can’t star in movies go: Politics.”

“Bernanke’s out there saying that the economic recovery is close to faltering. There is no recovery. They want to pretend that there is. How’s that recovery working for you? That hopey changey thing?”

“I guarantee, a lot of people are walking out of Apple’s auditorium today singing Peggy Lee’s ‘Is That All There Is,’ because they were expecting, they were hoping, these guys already had renderings, photos of what the iPhone 5 looked like; much bigger screen, thinner tear-drop design, all these guys were orgasming over it.”

“If you go back and look at pictures, we’ve had some pretty hefty presidents. You know, there was a time in American history where being fat was the quintessential sign of achievement and success. I’m talking about the days even before air-conditioning, it was that far ago, in the 1900s, it was a sign of status.”

“I don’t care what you tell Snerdley in the screen process. He’ll tell me if it’s worth it. If you end up past Snerdley, I don’t need to know what you told him. Snerdley doesn’t remember anyway, he’s already off to the next call.”

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