Rush Limbaugh

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RUSH: I have to thank Herman G. Rowland Sr. Folks, it’s amazing how these things work out. We have these little gift packages at Two If By Tea, the two mugs and the jelly beans, the Jelly Belly jelly beans and they’re at the TwoIfByTea.com website. They’re fabulous and I’m getting, as I told you, great feedback. These are 14-ounce mugs and they’re made in America, me as Rush Revere on the mugs and a catchy TwoIfByTea.com slogan on their side. We just contracted to get the Jelly Belly jelly beans from a jobber, I don’t know who, and we got a nice note from Herman Rowland, who is the chairman of the board of the Jelly Belly candy company. They make Jelly Belly jelly beans. They’re the best jelly beans out there, that’s why we used ’em. I didn’t notice they’re in Fairfield, California, which is not far from my departed hometown of Sacramento.

We use red, white, and blue jelly beans, and I happened to mention that my favorite Jelly Bellies are the buttered popcorn flavor. Have you ever tasted the buttered popcorn flavor? Well, today we got a bushel of ’em. The Jelly Belly candy company sent stacks! We got a silo full of buttered popcorn jelly beans. I put some in there, Dawn, you should go in there when you’re not hassling Snerdley about something and have some. (interruption) No, Snerdley is complaining that you’re domineering in there, is all. I want to thank Herman Rowland, chairman of the board at the Jelly Belly candy company for the jelly beans. That’s what it’s like to be me. That’s what it’s like to be me. The cable company showing up in a half hour to fix the mess that hadn’t worked for three weeks.


RUSH: Neil in Matthews, North Carolina, I’m glad you waited. Welcome to the program, sir.

CALLER: Hey, Rush. Hey, I’ve got a bone to pick with you, Rush, about your Two If By Tea, specifically the unintended consequences that I have to deal with after entering your Two If By Tea promotional contest.

RUSH: Yeah?

CALLER: This year my wife and I couldn’t afford to celebrate our 30th anniversary and my only daughter, her 13-year birthday she wanted a computer tablet. So I entered the Two If By Tea Hawaii trip contest. I figured, you know, whatever, let’s see if I can win something. Well, a few days after the Two If By Tea was delivered — on time, by the way — there’s the unintended consequences of entering the contest. My daughter is now hooked on raspberry Two If By Tea, and if I’d let her, she’d drink it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, so now instead of a one-time gig, I gotta continue to buy raspberry Two If By Tea to satisfy my daughter’s appetite.

RUSH: No. Oh, no and if I extrapolate on what you said at the beginning of the call your daughter’s behavior and demands for a constant supply of tea is taking you into poverty?

CALLER: It’s taken me completely into poverty.

RUSH: Well, this is a shame. Gee, what should I do about this?

CALLER: Well, I don’t know, she loves this stuff. I mean, listen, we got a case of it to enter the contest. I got I think a bottle and a half, and I think my wife got one bottle. The rest was hoarded by my daughter.

RUSH: Well, that’s the way kids are. I’m happy to hear she likes it. I mean that’s great news, but you’re going into poverty.

CALLER: Yeah. Well, you know, these are the unintended consequences of your Two If By Tea promotional contest.

RUSH: Well, there’s always voting for Obama, you could do that.

CALLER: Well, she’s a Rush Baby. I don’t think she’d ever vote for Obama.

RUSH: Yeah. You said she wanted a tablet computer?

CALLER: Yeah, whatever that is. We got a desktop, an old desktop but she wants a tablet or something like that. So that’s why I entered the contest.

RUSH: Gee, you know what, and you like the tea, right?

CALLER: Love it. Especially the raspberry. And I can’t wait for the new flavors to come out.

RUSH: Oh, God, these new flavors, you know what, we’re gonna sell out of these new flavors, it isn’t gonna be long. You wait ’til you taste these. We’re not gonna be able to keep these new flavors in stock.


RUSH: I’m waiting for Kathryn to give me the clearance on this. The new flavors are being bottled this week. I mean they’re in the process of being bottled. They’re at the bottling plant right now. The bottles are being filled to the brim with two new flavors. But, look, we still gotta go through the — there’s federal shelf life tests. I mean you wouldn’t believe the hoops to jump through to bring it to market. It won’t be that long ’cause we did a lot of this prior to the bottling process starting. But, anyway, gosh, I’m in a quandary here, I don’t know what to do now. Got a guy going into poverty here buying the tea. I don’t know. What am I supposed to do? Hey, Neil, Merry Christmas.

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