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RUSH: Folks, are you all still loaded for bear out there? Will you indulge me for one more inside baseball moment here? Won’t take very long, but this one needs to be dealt with quickly and we’ll move on because unemployment’s back up and Gallup, according to them, it’s big, and other things are happening as well. They always are this time of year, and in this type of year. Great to have you here, Rush Limbaugh, the Excellence in Broadcasting Network and the Limbaugh Institute for Advanced Conservative Studies.

Yesterday I explained to you how it is that we have not lost whatever the number is today, 45 or 43 advertisers. Today there’s a more blatant example of what journalism has become, and it’s in the Washington Post. It’s a story written by a woman named Alexandra Petri. I don’t know how it’s pronounced. Alexandra Petri. And let me read you the headline of this news story. I don’t know if it’s in the newspaper or just on their website, but here’s the headline: “Rush LimbaughÂ’s Show Targets Jerks, Judging From the Latest Ads — Advertisers learned something about Rush LimbaughÂ’s demographic this week. ‘Here we thought lots of pleasant, upstanding people were listening to and enjoying the rational things Rush had to say,’ dozens of companies said. ‘Apparently not.’ It turns out that people who really, truly still enjoy Rush LimbaughÂ’s show are — how do I put this? — jerks.”

This is the Washington Post characterizing you. “At least thatÂ’s what the new advertisements moving into the vast empty lot of Rush Limbaugh, Inc., implies. … So far, heÂ’s picked up AshleyMadison.com, the site where you go to cheat on your wife, and another website that is explicitly for sugar-daddy matchmaking.” There’s only one problem. We are not running spots or commercials from AshleyMadison.com. In fact, when we find that they are running in our program in local markets we call the local affiliate and tell them, “Don’t run these ads in our show.” We do not sponsor companies that help people cheat on their spouses. And right here it is in the Washington Post, claiming that we are.

Now, the people that run Ashley Madison are out saying they’re willing to advertise on our program. There are stories and advertising blogs about this, but we have not accepted it. Right here in the Washington Post. Ms. Petri, I don’t know who feeds you your information — I have a pretty good guess — but you might want to double-check here because you’ve written something that’s patently false, it’s an out-and-out lie complete with your b-i-itchy opinion in it, and it is untrue. We are not running commercials. We wouldn’t accept commercials. We have rejected their offers from outfits that do this kind of thing, provide a way for you to cheat on your spouse. We have never knowingly had this company in our program.

And again, there are two ways you can get on this program. You can come and be an official EIB sponsor, or you can buy commercial time on one of our local affiliates and become one of 18,000-plus advertisers that we will never know about, except with things like this. When we find out, we do our best to clear this inventory. So I wanted to set this straight. It is an out-and-out lie, just like every other report about lost advertisers and everything else that you’re seeing. Nothing could be further from the truth. We have new sponsors coming on in the next week two weeks, three of them at least. As I said yesterday current advertisers that canceled, had a couple meetings with them, they’re asking to come back in. There’s literally nothing factual being reported about this.

So just so you know, as though you don’t know — I’m sure you do — what is in the Washington Post, either in their newspaper or on their website, is an out-and-out lie. I mean it’s not even close. This is a so-called reporter, Alexandra Petri, who simply accepts false information from a site, probably Media Matters, who knows, that she trusts. We are not running spots from this company that tells you how to cheat on your spouse, we never have, and when we find out that they’re running on local stations, EIB affiliates, we call the affiliate and we ask them not to. Nor will we ever accept such advertising, because you are not jerks. You in this audience are among those who make this country work.

On the second page of this story: “But AshleyMadison, the website for people seeking extramarital affairs, and SeekingArrangement.com, which is, as Politico reported, the self-proclaimed ‘worldÂ’s largest sugar daddy and sugar baby dating website’ — theyÂ’re now both firmly on board,” the Rush Limbaugh program. They are not “firmly on board.” They never have been firmly on board and they never will be firmly on board. Folks, I must be honest. (joking) At one time months ago we considered taking AshleyMadison.com because we know that Bill Clinton listens to this program. So we know one member of the audience cheats on his spouse, did so in the Oval Office, and in an attempt to perhaps include everybody we thought maybe we would help out, but we decided no. We didn’t know anybody else in this audience who cheats on their spouse besides Bill Clinton, so we rejected it. John Edwards listens. So that’s two of them. John Edwards listens to the program. Ted Kennedy listened to the program. But we decided to reject it.

We have never run ads from either of these two companies, we never will, and again, for the last time, when we find out that they are running on local stations during this program, we ask the stations to move the commercials. Just that simple. Alexandra Petri, Washington Post, has got the snarky, lying, full-of-holes so-called report today, and I guarantee you, she’ll run another story tomorrow saying I made this all up, and I’m trying to cover my rear end but, folks, it isn’t true.

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