RUSH: Mike on the Big Island in Hawaii. Great to have you on the program, sir. Hello.
CALLER: Good morning, Rush. Great to talk to you. I just was wondering, you know, with so many things being turned on its head like the Jenner transformation and all of that, I’m just wondering, how long do you think it’s gonna be before a man who has chest implants who still considers himself a man asking society to allow him to walk around without a shirt, because he’s still a man?
RUSH: Fascinating thought. Fascinating thought, Mike. How long have you been thinking about this?
CALLER: Just this morning when you touched on the Jenner thing. I just started thinking everything is not what we used to know, and before we know it, we’re gonna have to be asking to accept things that are just gonna be so shocking —
RUSH: No, no, I get it. But, see, I’m a literalist. That’s why I’m the mayor of Realville, so when you talk about the day coming where a man can go get chest implants, breast implants so he can walk around without a shirt, a man can do that now.
RUSH: Can walk around without a shirt. A woman — well, it’s not long — can’t. So why would a guy need to go get breast implants in order to be able to — you mean to make the case that women are being discriminated against, but if he goes and gets breast implants and then goes around without a shirt, “Hey, I’m a guy, I’m a guy, I just happen to have breast implants, you can’t make me put the shirt on.” Is that what you’re thinking?
CALLER: Exactly right. When you’re on the Big Island in Waikoloa, when the waiter wanted you to stop venting your vapor cigarette —
RUSH: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember.
CALLER: — because of what it looked like.
RUSH: Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, he’s exactly right. You remember that story?
CALLER: It was on the Big Island.
RUSH: It was at the Four Seasons bar right down there on the beach after playing golf, I was smoking electronic cigarettes. You’ve got a great memory out there, Mike.
CALLER: Well, Rush, the only thing that I miss about that story is that I wasn’t on the Waikoloa side on the Big Island watching you enjoy your meal because I never get to meet you. (laughing)
RUSH: Well, we weren’t eating. We were at the bar. We were consuming adult beverages and I was having a cherry flavored e-cigarette. The manager came up, said, “Mr. Limbaugh, I’m sure you understand, we’re serving food here and state regulations prohibit –” I said, “It’s not a cigarette.”
He said, “It’s not?”
“No, no, no, no. It’s an electronic cigarette. Here,” and I exhaled some water vapor, which is what looks like the smoke.
And he said, “Wow, that smells good.”
I said, “That’s right, it’s water vapor. There’s no tobacco in this. It’s pure water vapor. It’s got nicotine in there, chemical reaction takes place, heats up, and that’s all it is. It’s a nicotine delivery system without tobacco.”
Okay! Fine and dandy! No problem!
He comes back in a half hour. “Mr. Limbaugh, I must ask you to stop. There’s a woman that says it’s setting a bad example. It looks too much like a cigarette. I told her it’s not a cigarette, but she said it looks too much like one, setting a bad example for young people.” There weren’t any around. “It’s not permitted, and it looks like a cigarette, and would you please, would you please…”
I said, “Are you officially asking me to put this down?”
“Well, no, but it would really help because the woman –“
“Who is it?”
He said, “I’m not gonna tell you.”
I said, “How many?”
“It’s just one woman.” So I looked around, I mean, very, very secretively. I found out who it was. You could just tell by looking at her, just a ninny nanny busybody, probably a Democrat, who was upset at a bunch of people having a good time. I was nowhere near her, and even if I was, this was not have bothered her. It’s water vapor. Mike, great memory.