RUSH: By the way, since we’ve delved into parents and kids here, grab our PSA on condom snorting. We put this together after we learned that this is an up-and-coming activity among young, primarily boys, but some girls are doing it ’cause condoms thrill them. And so we thought it would be helpful for a bit of guidance for parents. Do we have this ready to go? We do. Okay in three, two, one.
ANNOUNCER: In the public interest, the EIB Network, in conjunction with a national condom educational project present: Safe Snorting Dos and Don’ts. After a number of today’s youngsters were injured doing incredibly ignorant thrill challenges, parents were in need of a safe alternative to driving while blindfolded, eyeball piercing or the Tide pod challenge.
While it might seem strange to mom and dad, condom snorting can be good, clean fun if done correctly. Always provide the child with small to average size pre-lubricated condoms. Avoid black anaconda or superhero. Limit the use of ribbed or textured condoms to end frequent trips to the emergency room. And for a special treat, flavored condoms at snack time are always a favorite.
KID: Thanks, mom.
MOM: Have a good time.
ANNOUNCER: Don’t be judgmental, or they will do something else that will damage their brain even more.
KID: I did it! I did it!
MOM: Here, honey, try another.
RUSH: Always looking out for the kids here at the EIB Network.