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"The mainstream, State-Run Media have met their Waterloo -- and it is Barack Obama."
"It is a great question to ask: What has Obama done for you? What have the liberal Democrats done for you? They've been running the show since 2007 on Capitol Hill. So what have they done for you?"
"We have a deficit we can't pay off, we have unemployment about to go double-digit, and Obama wants to destroy the health insurance policies a huge majority of Americans have and like. He isn't rescuing anything; he's destroying it -- and he's doing it on purpose."
"Obama doesn't debate. He clears the field. He gets rid of opponents. He does not debate issues. He has his ideas, and they are right, and they are going to happen come hell or high water, and we don't even have the right to disagree."
"Can you imagine, folks, if they'd have done health care first instead of Porkulus? They would have gotten it. I'll bet Rahm Emanuel is kicking himself and the furniture and sending dead fish to himself because he's all upset about his strategic blunder."
"See, Obama doesn't care if he destroys private insurance companies. He doesn't care if he destroys the automobile industry or millions of jobs, either. But, boy, let's start talking about his presidency being destroyed, and now we got some anger!"
"The Democrats are dragging out people who had or have cancer to support their health care bill. Okay; how about we present those who have illnesses that won't get the procedures they need because Obama and the Democrats are going to be denying them?"
"I do the show with half my brain tied behind my back just to make it fair. You know, I actually wish I could give some of my excess talent away, but it's just not possible."
"Elective abortions will be covered in Obama's plan, so the way to explain this to people is that President Obama -- of the compassionate Democrat Party -- wants to provide cover for those who kill us before we are born. It's called efficiency."
"Obama's 'career' is five minutes old. He had maybe 150 days in the Senate! He's never done anything! So obviously it's time for a third memoir."