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"MSNBC has a new slogan: Lean Forward. Well, I want to add something to it."
"Can you imagine you're Mrs. Clinton? And here comes Moochelle Obama, the number one most powerful woman in the world? And what has she done? She's had a no-show job at a hospital in Chicago, she's grown vegetables in the garden, and she's taken cool vacations."
"So there are 30 companies that, in order to provide their employees health care, need a waiver from the new Obamacare law. What does that tell us?"
"Obama doesn't make mistakes. Narcissists are not capable in their own minds of making mistakes."
"We will concede here that Nancy Pelosi is on crack and is crazy. Well, I said that on Family Guy, and nobody refuted the charge. I mean, I haven't heard anybody deny it since the show aired on Sunday night."
"Mayor Bloomberg clearly has body image issues. I mean, let's be honest about this."
"Obama wants to be the guy the UFO people want to meet when they land. You know, 'Take me to your leader'? He wants to be that guy."
"Thanks to President Obama, we're having the best race relations we've had in this country since the Rodney King beating."
"Obama's only complaint is he wants more credit for what's going on. He thinks he's revolutionary himself. He thinks he's the one we've all been waiting for. He is convinced that we don't know what's good for us -- all leftists are that way."
"Rick Sanchez is a jackass."