RUSH: We said last week that this Ukraine situation was a showdown between ACORN and the KGB. If you will recall, that is one of the ways I characterized it. But in view of the mocking that Obama is getting from the Russians, folks, they are openly laughing at our president. They are openly mocking Barack Obama! This was not supposed to happen, if you recall the campaign of 2008. In view of the mocking that Obama is getting from the Russians, this is also looking like the prankster versus the gangster. 'Cause Putin's calling Obama a prankster with his sanctions. Obama's gonna sanction some individual Russians, so the Russians came and said, "Okay, well, we'll sanction you!" And they're mocking him.
Now, one thing that you have to admit: They did not laugh at George W. Bush. You know, it's funny, folks, our news media claimed for years that the world viewed George Bush as a cowboy, a renegade, an out-of-control hayseed that did not have the respect of any nation around the world and we were being laughed at and joked about and made fun of. Well, they never laughed at George W. Bush. They never mocked George W. Bush. They may have wished he was dead, but they are laughing at Barack Obama, and they're laughing both at his face, to his face, and in his face.
You remember back in 2008, when Obama ran on the promise of restoring America's prestige around the world. You know, come to think of it, that may have been the mother of all Limbaugh Theorem ploys. If you'll recall, I devised the Limbaugh Theorem to explain how and why Obama was not blamed at all by the American people for this disastrous economy. It was I and I alone who came up with the explanation for this. I'm not gonna bother you with the explanation; you know it, you are regular listeners. I dubbed this the Limbaugh Theorem. Well, okay, essentially it was that Obama was never seen literally governing. Even after being immaculated he continued to posture himself as always campaigning.
He was always seen as opposed to what he was doing. And he was able to fool people into believing that he also opposed what was going on even though he was the one doing it. And of course he had the cooperation and help of the Drive-By Media. But I'll tell you, I think the mother of all Limbaugh Theorem ploys was that 2008 presidential campaign where Obama promised to restore the prestige of the United States around the world, because increasing America's standing in the world was the last thing Obama and his team wanted to do. And if you have any doubt about that, just look around.
This cannot be accidental. There's just too much wreckage. There's just too much ineffectiveness. There's just too much apathy on the part of the president about things happening around the world for it to be anything other than purposeful. Everywhere you look. Thanks to the missing Malaysian airliner, our media guardians pretty much succeeded in maintaining a blackout on the news about Putin's invasion and annexation of Ukraine. I think it's safe to say the low-information crowd doesn't know anything about that. And not just the low-information crowd. There are a lot of Americans don't thing about it because all that's on the news is the missing airliner and whether or not supernatural forces have taken over; whether or not there's a new Bermuda Triangle in Malaysia. All of this.
I have another simple explanation for this, by the way, coming up in a moment that I'll offer, and it's simple, and it's entirely plausible. And it's with the help of a former pilot. So all in due course. I can't do everything here in the opening monologue. But I will comment on things as they occur to me during the monologue.
So, anyway, the coverage that the American people are getting about Ukraine, Obama being laughed at, it's really being obscured by the 24/7 coverage of the missing Malaysian airliner, which has to be frustrating to Putin. I mean, look at how much money he has spent on plastic surgery, Botox injections, preparation for his star turn on the world stage. I mean, he's gone out there and he's fought with bears and he's gone fishing and hunting. He's taken the shirt off. He's got the Botox. He's been lifting weights, maybe taking steroids. He's been doing everything he can to look like an American superhero actor, and he can't buy 30 seconds of media time because we're focused on the Malaysian airliner. He's gotta be really mad.
An angry KGB guy is something we don't want to deal with. A KGB guy in his natural state, bad enough, but now he's spent all this money being noticed for his big moment on the world stage, reassembling the Soviet Union, and nobody is seeing it, which means, folks, that he's going to have to amp it up. He's going to have to do even more to call attention to himself and get the media focused on him. Well, maybe he could find the plane and be done with it. Maybe Russian technology could be that which finds the plane, who knows. He's gotta do something. Obviously annexing Ukraine and Crimea, not enough. He could take over Poland. Hell, he could make a move on Germany. I mean, any number of things, but I'm just telling you, Putin has spent a lot of time and a lot of money -- well, the Olympics, all to get noticed and he can't bump this Malaysian airline off the front page.
Hell, the Botox injections alone, folks. I mean, even when you have the government to pay for it, it still is a lot of money. He's up to Pelosi's spending levels by now, I would think. But then again, Putin of all people should understand. I mean, just like in his country, our news media know that their primary job is to protect the Regime. He understands this. He understands the media here's job is to protect the Regime, and it's much better to devote wall-to-wall coverage on a story nobody has a shred of information about than having to report on Obama's obvious humiliation at the hands of comrade Putin. But I've got stories and they're laughing at him. They're laughing at our president.
ABC News: "Russian Deputy PM Laughs at Obama's Sanctions -- Russia’s deputy prime minister laughed off President Obama’s sanction against him today asking 'Comrade @BarackObama' if 'some prankster' came up with the list. The [Regime] hit 11 Russian and Ukrainian officials with sanctions today as punishment for Russia's support of Crimea's referendum.
"Among them: Aides to President Vladimir Putin, a top government official, senior lawmakers, Crimean officials, the ousted president of Ukraine, and a Ukrainian politician and businessman allegedly tied to violence against protesters in Kiev." All have been sanctioned by the Regime. What does that mean? How do you sanction an individual? I guess you tell 'em, "You're sanctioned!"
In some worlds, "sanction" means a contract on you and you're dead. That's not what Obama means. What, he's freezing their assets? Is he freezing their bank accounts? What is he doing? It's a minor detail in this story that our media guardians are ignoring, but I, El Rushbo, discovered it. Buried in the bottom of the ABC story, we find this.
Quote: "US officials said that, among the sanctioned individuals were the 'key ideologists and architects' of Russia's Ukraine policy, while adding that some of the Russian officials were included in the list for their role in curbing 'human rights and liberties' in Russia." In other words, some of the Russians are being sanctioned because they have said mean things about homosexuals.
That's what that means. The real reason Obama is sanctioning these people -- you have to dig deep in the story -- is because Obama is unhappy with what the Russians have had to say about men who sleep with men, and women who sleep with women, which some people find less objectionable. I leave it up to others to make those judgments. But now we understand.
In fact, one of the people listed by ABC as being sanctioned is Elena Mizulina, "A senior lawmaker, she is considered one of the Kremlin's morality enforcers in the parliament. She is perhaps best known as the co-author of last year's homosexual 'propaganda' law[,] which sparked outrage overseas." That's a real reason Obama is imposing sanctions. He's not even doing it because of Ukraine and Crimea.
Not that it matters to people. But it's another example of Obama mocking that the Drive-Bys seem to be ignoring, although Thomas "Loopy" Friedman in the New York Times has been made aware of it and is worried that Obama is looking weak in this circumstance. So we've got this ABC story about the Russians basically think Obama is a joke. The Daily Beast: "Russia Will Sanction US Senators."
Now, if Putin is doing this kind of nonsense in response to Obama's nonsense, it's only because it's another way to mock and show his unbridled contempt for Obama. And, by the way, I should point out, ladies and gentlemen, that Mikhail Gorbachev has chosen sides in this battle. Now, you know as well as I do that the American left loves Mikhail Gorbachev. He was the savior.
It was Gorbachev that saved the world from the cowboy Reagan. It was Gorbachev that brought sanity, glasnost, perestroika, freedom to the world -- and stopped the evil cowboy, Ronald Reagan, from nuking the world. They even gave Gorbachev a portion of the Presidio to start some environmentalist wacko, 501(c)(3) out there. It's the Green Cross or some such thing. Mikhail Gorbachev has thrown in with Putin.
He, too, Mikhail Gorbachev, is mocking our president. Meanwhile, the AP reports that Putin has "approved a draft bill for the annexation of Crimea." So while all of this is going on, Putin continues on his expansionist role. Here's the deal about Gorbachev. "Former Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev, however, hailed Crimea's vote to join Russia as a 'happy event.' ...
"Gorbachev, in remarks carried Tuesday by online newspaper ... said Crimea's vote offered residents the freedom of choice and justly reflected their will. The referendum showed that 'people really wanted to return to Russia' ... Gorbachev added that the Crimean referendum set an example for people in Russian-speaking eastern Ukraine, who also should decide their fate."
So the hero of the left, a guy that the left thinks would be cozying up to our president, Obama -- a man who single-handedly, in their view, ended the Cold War, that Gorbachev -- has signed on with Vladimir Putin.